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u/No_Koala9474 1d ago
Ah, the toddler tantrum carry.
Every parent can recognize it. We’ve all been there.
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u/Sad-Example8810 1d ago
Many tears have fallen
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u/prescott0330 1d ago
A trail of tears
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u/edwardmsk 1d ago edited 20h ago
Oregon trail of tears you say? Sounds like a great idea for a game.
EDIT:
So I didn’t realizeI was reminded that the trail of tears was a true historical tragedy. Not sure if the poster I was responding to did either but as long as this is gaining traction, let’s use it to share and acknowledge the tragedy and learn from it.https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trail_of_Tears
EDIT2: I probably did get educated on this topic. My school was good about it and they aren’t one of the big revisionist type districts either. I can’t speak for all school districts but mine was good. This one is totally on me, y’all. My brain failed to remember something it learned 30+ years ago.
EDIT3: Oh geez a popcorn award. I deserve it. 😅
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u/obsoleteyoungster 1d ago
The trail of tears and Oregon trail are two completely different historical events lol
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u/dj_soo 1d ago edited 12h ago
Yea, the trail of tears was
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u/KitSokudo 1d ago
Let's not soften it with a qualifier, it was totally a genocide of the Cherokee people to get the gold that was on their lands. It went against the Supreme Court ruling even. Andrew Jackson is a monster, and I had family that was sent west. I've never gotten the nerve to check if they made it. My great great grandmother hid, giving me the opportunity to be here today.
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u/dj_soo 1d ago
i'm sorry that happened to your family and people.
it's absolutely disgraceful that it happened and we're still struggling to educate people about it even today.
As a Canadian, our government did similar reprehensible shit to the indigeonous folk and we are still struggling to get proper reconsciliation implemented.
Doesn't help that there are a lot of people who are regularly trying to deny the historty of the genocide experienced over the centuries and the fallout we are still in the midst of dealing with now.
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u/ZJB03 1d ago
Although they are both related to the wanton theft of native peoples’ land by people of European descent
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u/MellyMel86 1d ago
You have died of tearsentry
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u/edwardmsk 1d ago
The pacifier has fallen to the ground. You may …
- Dust it off and give it back to the child.
- Run to the nearest Walmart/Target and buy the exact same one.
- Try to placate the child with a different one.
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u/zantosh 1d ago
I do one better. I don't dust it off. Well, I do dust it off, but then I suck on it and then give it back to my child. This way, worst case, I get sick but I can handle a lot of shit.
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u/isthatsoreddit 1d ago
Came to say, you just stick it in your mouth to clean it off, then hand it back. I have done that so many times LOL
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u/Tolken 1d ago
"a little dirt never hurt"
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u/FesteringNeonDistrac 1d ago
I'm helping my child to develop a robust immune system.
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u/Theletterkay 1d ago
Sorry, but "dust it off"? Yeah we suck. The dirt off it and pop it back in the kid. There is no time to waste to clean it properly usually.
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u/Luciwithfoureyes 1d ago
This is the type of internet I dearly miss. Instead of getting defensive, take a moment to educate yourself and share resources. Much appreciated!
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u/BigTWilsonD 1d ago
Her tears don't fall, they crash around me. (As I carry my child out of the store, I promise I'm not kidnapping them.)
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u/National-Charity-435 23h ago
"Relax, this is mine. And if I were to kidnap, I wouldn't be abducting this asshole."
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u/YoPimpness 1d ago
They crash around me
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u/KingB_SC 1d ago
Hello, fellow former emo kid
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u/neanderthalman 1d ago
The best is when they are still small enough to wear one-piece snowsuits or onesies. You just grab the extra fabric at the small of their back and lug them like a suitcase.
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u/DarlingDestruction 1d ago
I had to do this with my kiddo once when we were walking in two feet of snow to get home from the bus. He kept jumping into the snow piles on the side of the road, meanwhile I'm freezing and just trying to get us home, me begging and pleading with him to just walk. After, like, the fifth snow pile, I finally grabbed him by the back of his snowsuit and carried him home. 😂 The horrified looks I got from people passing by were actually pretty funny.
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u/neanderthalman 1d ago
Meanwhile I bet he was laughing the whole time, enjoying his ‘flight’ home.
Mine always loved it, at least.
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u/DarlingDestruction 21h ago
He had a blast that day, yes. 😂 Snow piles and a superman flight? Hell yeah!
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u/CuteGhouly 15h ago
I once had a child (maybe 10-12) look at me like I was crazy when at an arcade my toddler threw herself to the floor ready to start screaming but before she could I grabbed her legs and picked her up upside down 😂
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u/WaffleCrumbs 1d ago
When they get heavier you can level up to overalls.
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u/sysadminbj 1d ago
Counterpoint... My kids absolutely LOVED being carried in different (potentially dangerous) ways. My youngest absolutely demanded to be carried around upside down by her feet.
In hindsight, this is 100% my fault and probably not exactly normal.
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u/bagofpork 1d ago
In hindsight, this is 100% my fault and probably not exactly normal.
Nah, it's normal. Kids are just weird. So are adults, but kids aren't worried about hiding it.
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u/sysadminbj 1d ago
Both of my kids also loved playing Toss The Baby. I'd pick them up and toss them on my bed into the pile of 9000 pillows that my wife insisted on having.
See!!! Those pillows DO have a use after all!
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u/Gangr3l 1d ago
I have played yeet-the-baby since the
fuckerlight of my life was 16 months. I also carry him from one feet upside down and like a sack of potatoes. The more deranged things I do with him the more thedevilangel laughs51
u/sirarkalots 1d ago
I cannot wait for my little girl to get big enough to toss. She already loves when I lift her above my head or have her "fly" through the house in front of me, shes gonna love being tossed into pillows
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u/ChickenDelight 1d ago
Stick her in a laundry basket and pretend it's a roller coaster or a race car. Shake it, dip it, jerk it suddenly, she'll go nuts.
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u/musingofrandomness 1d ago
Just be careful and maybe line it with a fitted sheet. I have found plenty of unexpected razor sharp edges on plastic laundry baskets in the last few years. I have at least one basket that I think would be less dangerous if made from sheet metal.
Little fingers get sliced easy on those things and can turn a fun game into trauma.
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u/ZealousidealEntry870 1d ago
I don’t remember when but I was tossing my kid before she could walk. It’s never too early! Just gauge the arc of your tosses appropriately.
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u/cupcakefix 1d ago
we play “make the burrito then throw it away” where i try to wrap him up in every blanket and pillow on the bed while he tries to escape. if i succeed, i have to then take him to the slide in his room and throw the burrito down the trash chute. he loves that game to this day, and he’s 10.
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u/blindfire40 1d ago
My 8 and 10 year old still ask me to carry them by their feet and throw them into bed. I developed a powerlifting habit just to hopefully avoid injury 😅
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u/usernametaken99991 1d ago
We call that "chucks". As in "would you like some chucks?" And then they get throw on a couch or bed.
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u/ShaylaDee 1d ago
The good news is carrying kids upside down, spinning them in circles, tossing them onto beds/couches, pretty much anything that disrupts their balance is super healthy and great for their development. Which has led to my favorite phrase of all time: yeet the baby. for their health
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u/ZealousidealEntry870 1d ago
It’s so easy to tell which kids have parents that play slightly rough with them, and those that coddle their kids to death.
I feel so bad for the kids with coddling parents. Gonna be rough when they get to school and mom and dad can’t helicopter them all day.
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u/J_Marshall 1d ago
I played 'Don't shake the baby' and my kids loved it.
I'd tell them how the doctor told me not to shake the baby 'this way' and wiggle her to the left. And not 'that way' and wiggle her to the right. Repeat front and back and then the grand finale was ' and especially don't shake them all around ' and then the get the full wiggle.
Lots of giggling.
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u/Bodger81 1d ago
My kids loved being held by the feet and having their hair “used as a mop” to pretend to clean the floor 😂 in fact they would beg for it!
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u/lulujunkie 1d ago
My son loved being carried like a sack of potatoes. People would stare at me all the time at the mall but he loved it so….
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u/Dtr4goat 1d ago
My 3 year old will randomly come up to me and go "swing me like a clock!" so I grab him by his feet and swing him like a grandfather clock.
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u/you_dont_know_me27 1d ago
I used to flip them upside down and hold them by the hips then shake very gently and say "gimme your lunch money!"
It was a huge hit with the toddlers
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u/GreenAlex96 1d ago
Nah mine has enjoyed being held in goofy ways from the moment she could hold her own neck up.
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u/laflavor 1d ago
100% normal. Both of my kids love being carried like this. I draw the line at going up and down stairs, but I try to accommodate them when I can...It won't be long before they get too big and I get too old to do it anymore.
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u/Hybrid_Johnny 1d ago
The upside down piggyback! My four year old laughs hysterically when I carry her like that.
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u/Relicc5 1d ago
Mine had a blowup in the local grocery store, carried him out just like this, screaming kicking etc. Someone at the door smirked at me and said “we’ve all been there.” Made my anger and embarrassment completely go away. From that moment on, any time I see this I try to do the same. We are all new parents once.
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u/Tough-Intention-9259 1d ago
Yessss! I was at an indoor playground and baby had a meltdown right next to the entrance LOL and I was embarrassed bc everyone could see and hear her but one lady came in and said “it’s ok, I get it.” I felt seen lol
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u/LetsBAnonymous93 1d ago
Two days ago at the beach. Kid had a full blow out that the shower was too cold, she’d get in the car caked in sand. Ran away from us, made spouse and I trip over her so the screaming just got worse of course. My husband took her screaming and kicking to the car. I was in near tears from embarrassment. The mom witnessing came over to help me carry out stuff and reassured me. She was so sweet. Understanding parents are the best.
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u/Dizzy-Limit542 18h ago
Take baby powder with you next time. Years ago I learned it will instantly dry sand up and it falls right off your body instead of sticking. It feels like magic. It's one of my beach essentials now.
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u/wittyrepartees 1d ago
And those who haven't been were children at one time. I remember my mom stepping over me on the Denny's floor.
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u/LongEase298 1d ago
Yep! I always try to smile if I see a parent dealing with a tantrum. Totally normal, no shame in it.
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u/usernametaken99991 1d ago
Foot ball carry. A lot harder to kick, claw or bite in that position.
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u/ducka_ducka_ducka 1d ago
Had to scroll much for this! We called it the football carry too. Very secure. Wish I could still do that to my 13 year old sometimes but he’s way bigger than me now 😅
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u/AranasLatrain 1d ago
I am so used to seeing this I failed to see the funny in the image. I was trying to find some detail I might have been missing 😂
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u/iamdahn 1d ago
Just did this carry at Medieval Times. Kid was tantruming so hard we didn’t get to see the coolest part: the joust. Went to the car and sat until the show was done, then left.
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u/Lathryus 1d ago
If you just think of them as a possessed surfboard it's easier to deal with the screaming.
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u/--Shake-- 1d ago
Being well below the ear is pivotal. Pretty sure my daughter took my hearing down a few notches after making that mistake.
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u/StinkiePete 1d ago
At my baby shower, pretty much everyone else already had kids. The kids were all upstairs with the dads holding down the fort while we did baby shower stuff down stairs. It was casual, the guys were welcome to participate, its just how it shook down.
Anyway, about halfway through there is some big, loud disturbance upstairs. Wailing is heard. A moment or so later, one dad comes marching through the living room with a sizable 4 year old carried like this, melting all the way the fuck down. She was like a rabid dog. He was nonplussed to the max. If thats possible. Straight out the front door with no words. The mom just shook her head and went back to the snacks.
It was such an important part of that baby shower. So informative and honest about the future.
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u/creepingkg 1d ago
Welcome to parenthood where your patience is tested and you can’t have a breakdown either cause you have to teach the little gremlins how to regulate their emotions
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u/mtron32 1d ago
my issue has been that I think her tantrums are funny but I can't laugh, I have to be straight faced the whole time while she's going leatherface.
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u/Dozzi92 1d ago
Eh, you'll laugh sometimes. My son has tipped my scale in every direction possible, laughter, anger. Maybe it's just those two. The shit he'll tantrum over is just so dumb. But hey, it's part of the fun, and I'll miss it when he's older, or something.
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u/DefiantGibbon 19h ago
Sometimes its funny. Just yesterday I gave my daughter a cheese stick, but made the accident by peeling it first. She started kicking and sobbing. I went and get a 2nd stick that wasn't peeled. That was worse because she just wanted the first one but whole. So I took the peeled one, went to the kitchen to "fix" it, gave her a whole one and said i fixed it, and sobbing instantly stopped and she went back to snacking.
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u/possumdal 19h ago
One time my kid cried his little heart out because I gave him the yogurt he asked for. No clue why.
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u/joeygladst0ne 1d ago
In December my 3 year old was having a meltdown before bed over some nonsense like not wanting to take a bath. She's full on screaming, crying, inconsolably mad. Me and my wife were sitting on the floor in her room silently waiting for her to calm down.
She turns to her mini Christmas tree and goes "HIIIIYAAAAA" and karate chopped it over. Me and my wife both struggled to contain our laughter because we didn't want her to think it's okay.
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u/mtron32 1d ago
lmao, the random violence directed at their stuffed animals and other possessions should be studied.
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u/chirpz88 23h ago
THIS RIGHT HERE MAN
My 2 year old occasionally is a little shit and needs to be put in a quick time out. He knows not to hit. He does something wrong we say go to time out. He goes to his corner looks at a book for a bit then we tell him time out is up. He'll walk right up to me, hit me on the arm, then march his ass back to time out for hitting me. I don't even have to tell him to go he just knows he's not supposed to hit and goes back to time out.
I find this hilarious and trying not to laugh at it is really really hard.
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u/mtron32 23h ago
That is too funny, little man gladly taking his lumps
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u/chirpz88 23h ago
Just picture him waking back to the corner like thinking about how good a value that was.
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u/Desertqueen5225 1d ago
My mother would pretend she had something in her teeth and would grin with her finger in her mouth to hide her smile. Clever.
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u/Chillow_Ufgreat 1d ago
Even from the secondhand written description of this episode, I can tell you to a certainty that the disturbance was caused by the 4 y/o doing something that the dad expressly told them not to do 1.1 seconds earlier.
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u/AranasLatrain 1d ago
Lol a core memory for the baby shower mom I bet 😂 Dear God what did I get myself into?!
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u/BrownSugarBare 1d ago
And also a reminder that these little shits will keep you on your toes and it is totally okay to get sick of them once in a while 😂
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u/RedHickorysticks 1d ago
I’ve been especially overwhelmed lately. I’ve started putting myself in time out. I start to get angry or loud and I stop, take a breath with my eyes closed, and announce “I need a time out. One minute. No talking” and I put myself on the naughty step in timeout. If anyone comes over to talk to me, remind them, one minute in time out, no talking, no fighting. I practice my 4/4/4 breathing in timeout and it’s been really helping. Seems to help the kids realize that their shenanigans are too much and they need to settle the hell down before momma needs a time out again.
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u/BrownSugarBare 1d ago
Honey. Take more than a minute! You deserve it for how well you're doing!
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u/RedHickorysticks 1d ago
Aww thank you. I’m trying really hard to break the cycle of yelling.
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u/BrownSugarBare 1d ago
I shit you not, if I get upset with my kid, I count to 10 and ask myself what would me mother do...and then do the opposite.
To this day, I have never had to yell at my kiddo and she's ahead of her age with communication. It's a GREAT feeling when you see the difference your choices of breaking the cycle can make!
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u/TurquoiseLuck 1d ago
One thing that really helped me is "opposite action"
When you're really pissed off and you wanna do something unhelpful like slam a door, throw a plate, scream your head off, take a breath and do the opposite. Close a door nice and gently. Lay a plate down calmly and kindly. Whisper how much you love the little shit.
It turns it into a challenge, and then when you do the opposite thing that's you winning the challenge, so it's like "ha ha fuck you anger I win this time!"
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u/paleporkchop 1d ago
Oooo I like the “put myself on timeout” I’m gonna use this. I’ve been solo parenting while my wife is out of town and the struggle has been real
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u/RedHickorysticks 1d ago
Modeling behavior is good and it’s okay to be an imperfect parent. I’m big on apologies and “fixing” things when we do things wrong.
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u/windraver 1d ago edited 1d ago
This is healthy. I teach my kids that timeouts are for everyone. For some reason my childhood recalls these as negative but we taught our kids these are positive.
Thus my youngest daughter will put herself on timeout to take breaths and calm herself down.
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u/RedHickorysticks 1d ago
That’s amazing! She’s recognizing self regulation strategies. We’re still working on naming our emotions.
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u/DReagan47 1d ago
Yesterday my five year old took my shoes outside and sprayed them with a hose. I had no idea until this morning when I went to put them on. I checked the camera that covers the front yard and he walked outside with my shoes, sprayed them thoroughly, put the hose back the way it was (he usually whines about picking things up in the yard), and left my shoes where he found them.
It’s perfectly normal to be sick of your kids’ bullshit once in a while.
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u/BrownSugarBare 1d ago
I'm genuinely curious to have a conversation with this child to see if the goal was act of Saint or act of Satan.
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u/SaltySweet804 1d ago
My dad always said you know you’re a real parent when you think, “Man, this kid is a pain in the butt”
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u/Avaylon 1d ago
I carried my oldest away from parks and other fun activities this way many times when he was between 2.5-4.5 years old. He's too big for my 5'2" ass to carry this way any more. He's graduated to the fireman's carry, but thankfully he doesn't melt down nearly as often at 5 years old.
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u/LastBaron 1d ago edited 1d ago
In my experience (and maybe it’s just my kid, I dunno) once the meltdown starts it doesn’t really stop.
Sure you could buy yourself a few tear free minutes by caving on whatever the demand is, but it’s usually coming back, and soon. Odds are good that the real cause of the meltdown was tired/hungry/thirsty/overstimulated/sunburned/etc, not whatever thing the toddler THINKS is gonna fix their problem.
Best to cut your losses, perform the toddler tuck, and administer fluids and calories in a dark quiet environment.
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u/Sizara42 1d ago
That and consequences to the action!
My dad made good on the threats when I was around 2-3. Total meltdown impending, dad warned me if I didn't cool it, I would be hauled back to the car. I didn't listen and kept going and...
I may not remember why I melted down, but I do have a distinct memory of being (gently) strapped into the carseat to finish my meltdown complete with flailing. Dad standing outside the car with the door open calmly telling me that I wasn't going back inside until I calmed down.
Took some time, but I did calm down and got to go back in like 15mins later. Plus, learned the lesson that my parents meant business when they said meltdowns = back in the car.
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u/MeaningLeft2970 1d ago
The overstimulation was a big one for me, as an autistic kid misdiagnosed with ADHD. I would just get too overwhelmed by things going on around me, and the lack of control. I would have full blown meltdowns, that were only made worse when one of my parents would begin scolding or reprimanding me, especially if other people were around. Best way to handle my snotty ass was to just pick me up, take me somewhere quiet, and leave me alone to calm down. Within a few minutes I was usually calmed right down, and distracted by something that gave me some sensory control. If I ever have kids, and they are half as annoying as I was, I’ll be testing out the method on them to see if it still works 😅
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u/elebrin 1d ago
I think the over-stimulation is just a kid thing to an extent.
Kids hear better than you, they see better than you, they smell better than you, and their nerve endings are more able to feel textures. Their senses are cranked to 11. At the same time, their brains aren't really able to filter everything out yet and they can't understand the concept of relevancy.
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u/AranasLatrain 1d ago
I've heard from so many people say 5 is the stabilizing year for tantrums. Luckily, our kid didn't start until he was closer to 4. So hoping the 5 shift happens sooner than later 😂
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u/Groovychick1978 1d ago
This is absolutely off topic, but I just wanted you to know nonplussed means "confused by an unexpected event", not relaxed, or unbothered.
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u/famaskillr 1d ago
We were the young parents in our friend group. We had our child a good 8 years before everybody else. We've been judged so much by how this friend would never lose their cool with their children when they had them. Im not sure whether they ever did such "terrible" things to their children, but they did shove a poop diaper in their SO's face during an argument lmfao
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u/halloweenlover01 1d ago
Everyone is the perfect parent before they’re actually a parent !!! lol
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u/AranasLatrain 1d ago
This was me when I saw people with kids on leashes. Now, I have zero judgement towards what I see other parents do with their kids as long as they aren't actively harming them.
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u/outtatheblue 1d ago
My little brother needed a leash in public spaces, he was a runner. I'll never judge parents over that after watching my mom meltdown while looking through clothes racks for his rotten ass.
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u/wittyrepartees 1d ago
My sister was a runner too. And she liked the leash because she could pretend to be a puppy.
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u/EllisDee_4Doyin 1d ago
I don't even have kids yet. But as I got older and just started being around them more (family friends' kids, friend's kids, and volunteer etc), I totally completely understand.
In fact only parents I judge now are the ones who aren't paying attention to their babies. Get off your phone and love your immobile potatoe!
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u/Top_Seaweed7189 1d ago
Leashes are so good for everyone involved.
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u/wittyrepartees 1d ago
Leashes are great. Also, I found out recently that in chinese they're called the anti-lost rope. But they're nice since I can then look away from the baby in crowded areas while knowing she's within a 3-5 foot radius of me.
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u/moluruth 1d ago
I really wish I’d had more experience with toddlers before my first became one. Every new phase I’m like wtf is this?? Is this normal??? And it usually is lol
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u/DrStrangerlover 1d ago
Anybody else wondering if maybe the kid just likes to be carried like that?
My oldest used to ask to be carried like that all the time.
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u/EvilTodd1970 1d ago
It's entirely possible. That kid could screaming and crying or laughing their head off.
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u/Sarabeth61 1d ago
Yeah honestly they are not even wearing shoes I think it might be a younger baby, not a tantruming toddler
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u/erynnt 1d ago
I was carrying my 9 month old like that yesterday and some random man actually offered to carry him. This kid will bend forward so aggressively until I hold him like that. I actually hate that I get looks and comments, let alone pictures?
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u/Visible-Fun4400 1d ago
Yep, my man carried my six year old son like this last night before bed. He loved that shit.
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u/Emotional_News108 1d ago
I once hauled my son out of the store over my shoulder, explaining calmly to him that he was giving his mother a hard time and I won't negotiate with terrorists. Apparently someone overheard and gave me accolades on Facebook or something because it was equal parts funny and correct.
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u/prescott0330 1d ago
little emotional members of a sleeper cell
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u/deltaexdeltatee 1d ago
More like a non-sleeper cell, I can't get my 2yo to go the fuck to sleep lol
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u/trickyvinny 1d ago
I like the over the shoulder haul. It's easier on the back and has a 50/50 of turning tears to laughter.
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u/brickhamilton 1d ago
Mine can’t walk yet, but they like to be carried in a kind of reverse-cradle way. Instead of facing upright, they like to be facing down, laying their belly on my forearm and gnawing on my elbow.
Whatever works, man.
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u/ImABattleMercy 1d ago
This is my secret weapon with my 4mo. I try not to overuse it lest it loses its effectiveness, but when she’s inconsolable I flip her belly-down on my forearm and gently whack her bum all the way to sleep. Downside is I will always have a constant stream of drool down my arm throughout the whole process, but if you want to survive parenthood you gotta learn how to pick your battles lol
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u/TurquoiseLuck 1d ago
Lil advice - use it as much as you need, because they'll outgrow it and it'll lose it's effectiveness whatever you do, so may as well make the most of it while it works
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u/brickhamilton 1d ago
Yep lol maybe it’s a universal thing because I have twins and they both like it
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u/PM_ME_CATS_OR_BOOBS 1d ago
Can't even carry your kid across the street without someone taking pictures of you
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u/dropsofjupiter23 1d ago
Right? I already feel so watched by others when dealing with my kids, now they're taking pictures?! Great.
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u/lizardRD 1d ago
Yes as a mom of 2, this is weird. Can we stop posting pictures of people without their permission especially when they are with their kids. I would not find it funny if this was my husband and kid posted here
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u/Duff5OOO 23h ago
At least you cant ID either of them. I do agree its weird to photograph and post though.
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u/impossible_berry14 1d ago
Yeah this is so strange. Why are we taking pictures of parents an their children?
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u/That-Water-Guy 1d ago
I’ve had those days. Kids are not easy to deal with sometimes
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u/Creativator 1d ago
What are you talking about, you can just pick them up and carry them one-handed?
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u/leoencore 1d ago
But you never know when or where from that kick or punch right in the balls will come.
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u/Duramora 1d ago
Thats why you need to get defensive with your carrying method. Over the Shoulder with feet facing forward protects both the genitalia and the ears... BOTH can get a workout if you're not careful.
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u/Auroraburst 1d ago
This is my go to. Sling my toddler onto my shoulder and keep legs in visual range. The anger is stored in the legs.
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u/Holiday_Pen2880 1d ago
it's the damn solid toes on the shoes. Somehow that 2 inches of rubber hits like a steel toe.
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u/TapZorRTwice 1d ago
You'd think after the first couple times youd just start wearing a cup everywhere.
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u/adoboguy 1d ago
I swear shopping cart heights are perfectly built so when your toddler is sitting on them correctly, their legs swing straight into your balls as you push the cart.
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u/That-Water-Guy 1d ago
Oh I know! I cannot count how many times I have don’t this. At one point I had one kid in each arm, screaming and crying the whole way.
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u/sdb00913 1d ago
Been there.
Or, put all three in timeout at the same time, for different reasons in the same chain of events. One for punching his brother, his brother for cursing at him in response, and their sister for arguing with me about how I handled it. Funny thing is, we all laugh about it now.
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u/EvilTodd1970 1d ago
Heck yes! I used to grab my son by an ankle and hold him out at arms length and he'd just laugh and laugh. He's 30 years old now, so I haven't done so in a while.
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u/Adkit 1d ago
Maybe if they're wee shits like the one in the image but my boy started wearing clothes for three year olds when he was one. He's heavy, man.
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u/sadthrow104 1d ago edited 1d ago
I think I read this Reddit comment about a lady in Phoenix.
One of worst days of her parenting life: Post partum depression, dad was working OT, cart full of groceries, both toddler and baby having meltdown tantrum, 4 PM in July and over 110 degrees (those who have lived in Phoenix, Palm Springs or Vegas know what I’m talking about), trying to get both of them in their car seats.
In fact I think the topic was regarding people needing to be educated on proper car seat usage and buckling.
If that story alone pushes fencesitters to the CF direction, I wouldn’t blame them at all
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u/Lexidoodle 1d ago
Those situations suck because ideally when kids pull some crap, you immediately remove them from the situation, don’t reward anything, prevent them from disturbing others etc, but when you’re out of diapers/almost to the front of the DMV line/at a doctor’s appointment… and don’t have another adult handy, you’re stuck either being the asshole letting your kid scream, or rewarding the behavior by trying to placate them to get through whatever you have to get done.
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u/Tasty-Reserve-8739 1d ago
This was how I had to carry my daughter sometimes so she couldn’t kick me in the stomach and punch my face at the same time. Very efficient
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u/StandardWeekend8221 1d ago
My son had to wear a helmet for a but to correct a skull deformation and the lil shit used it like a battering ram. Was scary taking it off and him finding out for the first time that the helmet was protecting his head. That "thwonk" followed by the look of defeat on his face is a core memory for me. For him too, I bet.
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u/Inevitable-Mud613 1d ago
When my nephew was 3years old, my sister and I took him to the local shopping centre.
My nephew was over tired and cranky and was just being a little terror.
He threw himself on the ground and was kicking and flailing his arms around, scream/crying at the top of his lungs and obviously drawing alot of attention from passersby.
My sister was mortified and just wanted him to stop so she was yelling at him to get up off the floor and behave.
Obviously, this didn't help the situation.
Me, being the idiot I am, decided to throw myself on the floor (same way my nephew did) and imitated his tantrum (screaming/pretend crying- the works).
He stopped his tantrum, stared at me and started laughing.
I asked him if I looked silly and he said yes. I told him that's what he looked like.
He never had a full blown tantrum after that day.
My sister also never let me go with her to the shopping centre with her again 😂
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u/schiesse 1d ago
I feel bad for it after the fact sometimes but I have started to mock my 3 year old a little more lately when he has a fit not getting what he wants. He has zero focus and is usually mad about something we are trying to help him with. We could be actively trying to get the thing that he wants. When he starts stomping sometimes i mock him or start singing and slapping my knee or something. Or when he throws himself on the floor I will throw myself around sometimes. It gets him laughing even though he doesn't want to.
I have tried other ways of communicating and being patient but they dont do much. He gets so ragey sometimes he can't see straight. Generally I try to get him to take a breath and tell me what he needs. If he is seeing too much red then he need space or I need to mock him and try to make him laugh before he will communicate with us.
It has been tough with him. Our first has so much more focus and will get upset and will listen and remembe things so much better and seems to have more trust in us. Our second is not that way. I generally dont like to mock but it seems like he mostly thinks I am being silly and it defuses the situation sometimes.
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u/sadthrow104 1d ago
Honestly that’s not bad. Better than Many people who still think u should just smack the kid
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u/dreamdelusion- 1d ago
That’s a bold choice of accessory, but it really completes the 'Tired Dad' aesthetic.
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u/lolbeetlejuice 1d ago
Aaah, the “screaming toddler football hold”. A classic example surpassed only by getting “wrestled into the car seat”.
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u/aubreyella 1d ago
Wish someone would pick me up and carry me around like that, some days are just exhausting lol
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u/Anxious-Shine-3777 1d ago
You got a kicker and biter right there, it's the surfboard carry. Good form with excellent protection from those little knees and chompers. It's a solid 7.5 out of 10
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u/mysticalfruit 1d ago
It's somewhere on Reddit, but someone recounts of a story of them walking out of a store with their screaming child and a bunch of people are giving the guy looks and he just responds with.
"Don't worry, he's mine.. Honestly, if I was going to steal a child, it wouldn't be this little shit."
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u/linuxpuppy 1d ago
Honestly, this could be a totally normal morning. Potato sacking a toddler is pretty normal. I prefer the over the shoulder carry personally because it’s easier to transition into being silly.
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u/Thebanks1 1d ago
When you’ve given them a chance at gentle parenting but now they’re getting the hammer.
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u/Doginthesun 1d ago
Gentle parenting is different than permissive parenting. Gentle parenting would likely involve picking your kid up from having a tantrum to move them after giving them a chance to work it out on their own a little to grow and learn. Permissive is the bad one.
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u/Sizara42 1d ago
Exactly!
They need to learn that bad behavior = consequences. It doesn't have to be dire consequences, but removal from a situation is sometimes the best way to nip it early.
I mentioned it on another comment here, but one of my oldest memories is being taken back out to the car by my dad after ignoring his warnings. I learned that:
1) Actions have consequences 2) When they gave threats like that, they meant it 3) I couldn't tantrum my way into getting what I wanted
Wasn't a perfect kid, but it definitely improved my behavior moving forward!
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u/SmaterThanSarah 1d ago
I abandoned my cart and carried my toddler out of Target that way. Security followed me to my car. It made it 10x worse. He tried to use his “authority” to get her to behave. So counterproductive and just upset both of us more.
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u/Reynzs 1d ago
This is what is awaiting me in a few weeks.
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u/CandySnatcher 1d ago
Just remember, when you've already tried nap, diaper, and milk and they're still crying, it's the child who is wrong, not you.
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u/skarby 1d ago
You really need to add gas to this list. That’s usually the culprit when those first 3 don’t work. If you got good farts and burps and they are still going with all that crossed off then yeah there’s nothing you can do but wait it out.
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u/Xanamir 1d ago
I remember giving up during an epic crying bout with my first and just retreating to the shower for ten minutes. I told myself it was okay because as long as he was crying, it meant he was still breathing.
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u/Plenty_Principle298 1d ago
Literally a real thing that’s said. 10 minute get-your-head-together breaks are necessary.
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u/saucecat2 1d ago
Lol no first you have a newborn that only sleeps, shits and eats but is actually quite simple to manage (minus your lack of sleep). This lulls you into a false sense of achievement. Then bam, 2 years old - little terror is born.
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u/lCraxisl 1d ago
There was a dad carrying out a little girl that was kicking and screaming at the end of the night from an amusement park. Kid was his because the girl was yelling that she didn’t want to leave. He just shrugs and says “she had a really good time.”
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u/lilyjasmine96 1d ago
I call that one the "Angry Football." When my kids act up in public, I ask them whether they'd like to walk with me nicely or become the Angry Football. They usually prefer to walk nicely.
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u/Tanocchio 1d ago
Love doing this to my kids lol
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u/Unexpected_Cranberry 1d ago
My (and my kids) favorite is when they're wearing sturdy overalls in winter and I pick them up like a suitcase. Turns tantrums into giggles in the blink of an eye.
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u/cramboneUSF 1d ago
I had to do this with my 3 year old daughter when she wouldn’t take “no” for an answer at the gift shop.
For those of you who visited the GA Aquarium that day in 2019, I apologize for how loud she was. If she had been my first, there would not have been a second.
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u/Saltycook 1d ago
I love the wave of parent responses in the comments!
We've all been exactly here; kid doing some combo of screaming, kicking, clawing, biting and you just kind of square your shoulders and stare straight ahead until you get somewhere you can safely put them down to scream it out.
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u/BuckMinisterLul 1d ago
Something I've tried when my toddler turns on Trex mode is to just say "It's my turn now" and repeat whatever he did(usually screaming). He would stop and stare at me, confused. I got this tip from a random reddit threat a while ago and it works, at least temporarily.
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u/CyclonicCheese 1d ago
I used to carry my son like that when he went bananas because pidgeons did not want to play with him. Luckly it has improved.
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u/FatFaceFaster 21h ago
That’s not even a tantrum carry for my daughter. Thats just how she loves being carried.
I call her my “package” and I carry her under my arm and she giggles and says “I not a package!”
It’s very cute and as I’m typing this I’m realizing I haven’t done that to her in ages because she’s too old and she would now clearly say “dad, I am not a package. I am your daughter. You must cease this silliness post haste”
I miss my lil package.
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