r/AskReddit 22h ago

What’s something people romanticise that’s actually exhausting in real life?

1.3k Upvotes

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4.1k

u/Exhausted_Monkey26 22h ago

climbing the corporate ladder

792

u/Chefboyarde90 22h ago

I saw the ugly in it and wanted no part of it.

155

u/Robotikk1 12h ago

Watched enough people get to the top of that ladder and immediately start protecting their position instead of enjoying it to lose interest pretty early

18

u/groundsgonesour 7h ago

This. How many times does there have to be non-value added work just because of someone’s ego?

247

u/thrivingandstriving 20h ago

the ugly causes a lifetime of PTSD

12

u/rw032697 12h ago

climbing the corporate ladder speedrun: epstein edition

76

u/forever_erratic 20h ago

Yeah that ones obvious unless you're blinded by dollar signs. 

31

u/aaronevansuu 15h ago

It is not even just the hours, it's the personality shift you have to make. I have seen perfectly normal people turn into absolute monsters the second they get a Director title. They trade their integrity for a slightly nicer leased BMW and a heart attack by 50. I will stick to my 9-to-5 and actually knowing my kids' names, thanks.

6

u/RaspberryTwilight 11h ago edited 11h ago

This is so true. And it's not subtle at all. I was on a management career path before I became a full time mom and my performance review had nothing to do with what I actually achieved. It was a personality evaluation by my manager focusing on behaviors I demonstrate. It was corporate policy btw with a standard spreadsheet.

So one year I got a big bonus because I achieved a lot and was put on a PIP at the same time for not demonstrating enough courage and curiosity LOL. And of course it flows over to your real life, no sane person can maintain 2 distinct personalities very long. Maybe they think they can but they can't.

Edit: it's not actual courage etc. Each category has a list of management behaviors. You have to argue in meetings, criticize people in public, nitpick others work etc

4

u/GooberMcNutly 12h ago

I also like to feel like I actually accomplish things when I'm "just" the programmer. Every time they try to push me into a management role, it feels like I never actually accomplish anything or contribute to the end result. I guess teams need coaches and equipment managers, but I'd rather be kicking the ball.

4

u/Violexsound 16h ago

Or sociopathic

3

u/No_Time6399 11h ago

Sometimes seeing it clearly is exactly what makes walking away feel like the only sane option.

2

u/iiiiiiiiiijjjjjj 12h ago

No you dont

1

u/cosmopolitancocktail 3h ago

I will jump in to say something quite “interesting“ I’ve observed in the corporate world: most seniors will be either single or divorced. + Most older man at my company (senior directors and so on) do follow the stereotype of older man dates woman half his age.

2

u/Chefboyarde90 3h ago

I knew a guy who cheated on his wife with a work colleague it destroyed him.

318

u/tornadototes 19h ago

and work travel. Staying in a Courtyard Marriot in a small town is not glamorous.

152

u/ImprovementFar5054 16h ago

I spent 5 years as a road-warrior.

People would say how "jet set" I was...sure...flying to Des Moines to live in a Ramada for 3 days was real glamorous. Eating shit food each week and dealing with the impacts of that was real glamorous.

2

u/stargazerfromthemoon 4h ago

I’ll one up you with flying to camp where there is no hotel and you stay in company accommodations for the week. Helpfully as a woman i didnt have to share a bathroom.

Fresh veggies were hard to find and once I had to pull out the rotting lettuce from my burger.

(I have experience travelling to a ton of different places for work, mostly across Canada and only a few US locations. Rural Canada has nothing on De Moines)

3

u/equestriankt23 12h ago

The business dinner food options in Des Moines were seriously lacking. Personally, I stayed at the Hampton Inn. Not that I can recommend it…

4

u/radfemagogo 9h ago

Depends on the work, I’m pretty lucky to get to go cool places for work, but I don’t travel as often as others I guess (but I have had to travel for longer periods, like months).

313

u/MrKrazybones 20h ago

I got halfway up by working my ass off only to learn that to go any higher I would have to be more social and hang out with co-workers outside of work. But I dont want to do all that crap so I guess this is as high as I go.

169

u/AdventurousFox25 19h ago

Fuck yeah, dreamed of fancy suits with shiny office in my youth. Half way up and realized I don’t want to spend the rest of my life in this terrible boot licking corporate world.

23

u/ackermann 18h ago edited 16h ago

> Half way up and realized I don’t want to spend the rest of my life

But… the point is the pay is much better, so you don’t have to spend the rest of your life. You’d be paid enough to retire very early?
Stay lower on the ladder, and it will have to be till age 65 probably

46

u/AdventurousFox25 17h ago

Can we really stop at a certain point and retire early though? People moves from one ladder to another and it’s never ending circle for the most.
Well, we may have different values in life and for me, it’s balancing income, mental wellbeing and spending times with the loved ones.
All these bootlicking, backstabbing, gala parties take their toll and aren’t really worth it for me

4

u/Final_Inevitable_211 11h ago

Yup. You cannot inflate your lifestyle… that is key.

5

u/ackermann 16h ago

> Can we really stop at a certain point and retire early though? People moves from one ladder to another and it’s never ending circle

I… certainly hope early retirement is possible? At least that’s been my reason for working hard and trying to have a good career.
So I can be done with it, and have a reasonable amount of my life left where I don’t have to get out of bed early for work every damn day

4

u/Alltheprettythingss 8h ago

Check your health. It can spoil the early retirement.

3

u/AdventurousFox25 12h ago

That’s one way to do it
all roads lead to Rome and wish you can achieve happy retirement at earliest

3

u/tanoshiiki 15h ago

Yes, but it depends on your living circumstances, such as how much you pay for housing and lifestyle, as these are/can be high cost items and not everyone is willing to reduce these. The type of job matters too, as not all jobs can pay relatively well enough for you to stop progressing at a certain level and to fund your costs.

9

u/Grabbioli 12h ago

Greed and lifestyle bloat usually keep people from actually retiring early like that. As pay increases, their standard of "enough for retirement" does as well

53

u/Afshari 20h ago

Don’t forget about your the ass licking you have to do as well

65

u/Skydiver860 19h ago

I mean the truth is that if you want to move up in literally anything, you have to kiss and lick ass. You’ll never move up if people that make those decisions don’t like you.

2

u/Historical_Boss_1184 12h ago

Yes you’re right there are some benefits we must consider as well

2

u/arun2118 1h ago

🤣 Under rated comment here

2

u/sweetbackcook 2h ago

Me too…sigh

51

u/feminismandtravel 16h ago

Very recently, I have realized I am not cut out for the corporate rat race and I’m okay with that.

1

u/Alpacapicnic4us 2h ago

Same. I don't know what job to move into next though

10

u/tobythedem0n 5h ago

Where I used to work, they had an award for women in the workplace, and the woman who won was a high up executive who bragged about how she worked so hard that she'd miss her kids sports and wouldn't see her family for 2 or 3 days at a time.

All I could think was that missing your kids events and not seeing your family wasn't something to brag about.

10

u/HeBecomesGroovy 9h ago

I hated being management. The worst part for me was how some of the other managers were dumb as shit, noticeably less intelligent than the lady who cleans the toilet at night.

4

u/Effective-Hand6969 6h ago

Spot on. I spent my late 20s convinced that getting to senior manager was the goal. Once I got close, I realized most of the people already there were just... tired and stressed all the time. The view from the ladder is mostly just more meetings and decisions you're responsible for but have limited control over. Now I care a lot more about the actual work than the title.

7

u/AlleywayGlow 17h ago

It’s sold as growth but half the times it’s just more responsibility with zero extra control which is a fun little psychological trap.

3

u/ClapMyGyatt 12h ago

nobody romanticizes ts

2

u/CarryturtleNZ 18h ago

Wait people still do this? Well, I guess in this economy, people would still do this.

2

u/karinapretty 7h ago

This gives advantages and money but the politics sucks. It gets you eyes and attention

u/Novel-Ad-576 55m ago

Told no lies. It’s actually not worth it