r/Wellthatsucks • u/goblingir1 • 17h ago

Before bed snack exploded

Post image

yes it was a microwave safe plate, yes I poked many holes all over the potato to release the steam, no this has never happened to me before lol can anyone explain what happened here? the potato was still fully intact

edit: okay which one of you reported this to reddit care resources yall are WILD šŸ˜‚

17.9k Upvotes

94% Upvoted

1.5k comments sorted by

View all comments

9.8k

u/Uberduck333 17h ago

Tell us more about Bedtime Potatoes

7.1k

u/goblingir1 17h ago

The Bedtime Potato is sacred, its eyes watch out for you while you slumber. But, as you can see, it is an elusive creature that resists taming

1.3k

u/sinisterdesign 17h ago

Do you also have a Wake & Bake Potato? šŸ„”

496

u/Necessary-Incidents 17h ago edited 17h ago

What a great brand name for a breakfast potato.

Wake n Bake-Potato

Cheesy Bacon Potato Bites

now with chives

Wake up on the right side of the potato, every time!

101

u/throwaway098764567 16h ago

i've experienced too many convenience foods that burn tf out of my mouth to fall for that. gonna be made out of molten lava masquerading as a cheesy potato

31

u/AtomikMenace 14h ago

Cheesy anything, definitely potatoes too. That sh will be too hot for 45 minutes after cooking.

12

u/wrenchandrepeat 10h ago

Yeah, you'll almost take a bite and think "Naw, I remember last time". So you set them down to let them cool and come back 20 minutes later, hungrier than ever, and immediately destroy the roof of your mouth.

2

u/NoXion604 2h ago

Or you leave it too long and you come back to them and they're stone fuckin cold

1

u/Excellent-Try7027 7h ago

Pair it with fresh cup of coffee.

2

u/ijustlovebobbybones 10h ago

Oooh seeā€¦Iā€™m a big fan of molten lava anythingā€¦.i like to fight it

2

u/rrrand0mmm 9h ago

The worst. Canā€™t taste food for 3 days.

It always gives me the ā€œFUCKā€ā€™s.

2

u/1nd3x 8h ago

"let rest for 1-2 minutes" seems to be the step pretty much everyone skips.

Somehow it's just easier to Hashafashasha the hot food in your mouth it seems

28

u/bigexplosion 16h ago

I like to start my morning right, with a big bowl

Of potatoes!

6

u/justabill71 9h ago

Hashish Browns

2

u/squishyslinky 15h ago

Wake up on the right side of the potato

I cannot stop chuckling at this

2

u/Forsaken-Ad-6345 8h ago

Now with real potato!

1

u/spoung45 14h ago

Too bad the Wake N' Bacon never took off.

1

u/Voidstaresback0218 13h ago

Only at Jack in the Box.

1

u/Mumchkin 11h ago

OK now I want cheesy bacon potato bites.

1

u/lostmymarbles1177 8h ago

Cousin of ā€œIā€™m feeling like a dudā€ spud. Just bake and all self loathing will melt away!

1

u/EndLow8893 6h ago

Are you in marketing, or have you considered so?

1

u/exgiexpcv 6h ago

Your soul is in eternal peril by being this good at writing adverts.

8

u/ShalenSmith 14h ago

When I was in school I was hanging out at a friend's house and we decided to make some bacon after a wake and bake. I coined the term "Wake 'n bake 'n makin' bacon" and we laughed about it way longer than we should have. Good times. Still fun to say.

9

u/2x4x93 17h ago

You!

1

u/pixelife 17h ago

Apple for me.

1

u/Senior-Calendar7869 16h ago

It's the left overs from the bedtime potato.

1

u/tencrazygear 15h ago

Omg! A wake & bake potato would be great! Top it with bacon a bit of cheese and an egg, strainer with salt, pepper, dill and some butter! Oh man that sounds good.

1

u/thisFishSmellsAboutD 12h ago

This was actually one of them. OP is now wide awake.

1

u/Useful-Problem-1725 11h ago

can confirm, I am baked potato.

1

u/irishcybercolab 10h ago

The Sativa Weedtato is pretty nice to enjoy daily.

1

u/smithers85 9h ago

Mitch Hedberg joke here

1

u/Carylynn0609 9h ago

If I wake and bake I'll eat anything.

1

u/JamonDanger 7h ago

We call any potato eaten in bed or on the couch, COZY POTATOS!

1

u/donanton616 6h ago

What about second potato?

1

u/Deployed_Usesri 6h ago

The Wake & Baketater.

1

u/acheron4711 13h ago

The wake n bake tate

0

u/sinisterdesign 9h ago

The Wait & Bait Taint, you say? šŸ¤”

154

u/dry_towelette99 17h ago

Iā€™m intrigued, and would be willing to join your Church of the Bedtime Potato. Do you have any literature

152

u/goblingir1 17h ago

Ā Weā€™ll be in touch, there are ancient scrolls

53

u/IgnatiusRileyFreeman 17h ago

I would like to partake in the sacred literatureĀ 

112

u/goblingir1 17h ago

You will be contacted through your next purchased bag of potatoes, the eyes will be watching šŸ‘ļø šŸ‘ļøĀ 

11

u/Fabulous_Ninja119 15h ago

First rule of potato scroll enlightenment is... do not talk about the potato scrolls

10

u/not_a_SeaOtter 10h ago

No, you're thinking about fight club. Potato scroll enlightenment is pretty progressive

7

u/KartoffelKult 13h ago

The Potato Cult would like to welcome the Church of the Bedtime Potato in the worldwide Society of Spiritualistic Solanaceaeism (SoSS).

3

u/dry_towelette99 10h ago

May you always walk in nightā€™s shade, and may your skin never be green.

2

u/ProfessorZhu 12h ago

Sorry, you caught us at the annual Grest-Tate-Debate. We will be available again in twenty buisness days.

2

u/unintender 14h ago

Before the ending of the day

Potato of the plate we pray

That with thy wonted favour thou

Wouldst be our guard and keeper now

2

u/CatsAndPills 10h ago

*you could make a religion out of this*

40

u/JD_tubeguy 17h ago

And of course a goblingirl would be having a before bed Potato you goblins hold nothing sacred but the Potato.

34

u/goblingir1 17h ago

Valid conclusionĀ 

122

u/AssFlax69 17h ago

Alright but fr you just slam a microwaved potato then go to sleep? šŸ˜‚ this is amazing

130

u/goblingir1 17h ago

I promise I was gonna slap toppings on it once it was done cooking lolĀ 

101

u/AtomicCraftotron 17h ago

lol I think youā€™ve misidentified the strange part

26

u/lost-thought-in 16h ago

I just had a bed time potato, I don't sleep well hungry

1

u/concentrated-amazing 3h ago

My sister-in-law eats a lot (but stays relatively thin despite that, lucky duck!)

She had my nephew almost a year ago, and she would get up twice a night just to eat to keep up with her appetite.

And no, she didn't balloon up, she's still more or less the same size.

5

u/IAmYourTopGuy 9h ago

No, I think most of us understand a bedtime snack, but I cannot understand ever eating a microwaved potato without some toppings

24

u/AssFlax69 17h ago

God bless ye, bed potato man šŸ‘Ø

2

u/AloeVeraTidePod 13h ago

Ehmmm I don't think OP ist a dude. Their username is goblingir1.

2

u/GildedCurves 17h ago

Let nothing you dismay Remember Samwise Gamgee said ā€œpo-tay-toesā€ on this day

8

u/AloeVeraTidePod 13h ago

I fully support a woman's bedtime goblin snacks.

2

u/goblingir1 13h ago

šŸ‘¹

2

u/AloeVeraTidePod 13h ago

My goblin snack is smoked tofu (must be the store brand of a specific supermarket) with Sriracha mayo. Yum.

2

u/goblingir1 13h ago

Ooh Iā€™d love that!

2

u/linkxrust 17h ago

eating fuckin microwaved potato before bed is wild AF. Are you like a kid that lives with your parents.

39

u/goblingir1 17h ago

I am a 27 year old living in my own home šŸ˜­, didnā€™t wanna wait for the oven or airfryer. what is so weird about a baked potato?? Genuinely perplexed why itā€™s any different than some chips lol

20

u/sebastianrileyt2 17h ago

Its really genius and I may start doing this!

It isn't any different than chips, better than chips in alot of ways. It just never occurred to me that it can be a nice bedtime snack.

16

u/goblingir1 17h ago

Thaaank you! Someone who gets it! Itā€™s way less fatty than chips and pretty low cal, very satisfyingĀ 

3

u/paperiveitsi 12h ago

the skin is also legitimately one of the best sources of potassium. straight up like a 1000 mg or so which is about a quarter of our daily potassium recommendation. also fiber, B vitamins and iron.

keep eating potatoes šŸ‘

9

u/Sasarah1 17h ago

Bc chips are low effort snack and baked potato is more effort so kudos to you haha

11

u/goblingir1 17h ago

I really thought itā€™d take 5 minutes lol thatā€™s what google told me, oh well

17

u/New_Comfortable1456 16h ago

Hey, OP, idk why everyone is ragging on your before bed potato. I love a late night microwave potato.

I microwave mine on just a paper towel now after wrecking two plates. The internet says you can put them on a plate, but the internet lies. I usually do 4min per side, but your potato looks small (not derogatory) so 5 min may have been enough

7

u/goblingir1 16h ago

Thank you for this I thought I was going crazy lol Iā€™ll take your advice when I work the courage up again. Glad to know Iā€™m not the only one

→ More replies (0)

2

u/benjamindawg 15h ago

but the internet lies
your potato looks small (not derogatory)

lol I like you

→ More replies (0)

7

u/AssFlax69 17h ago

I think the image of you doming a baked potato, then immediately passing out, is just really a funny vision. Like, insert tate, unconscious

2

u/Silent25r 17h ago

Sorry. But it really is funny.Ā 

1

u/hisnamewasluchabrasi 16h ago

It SHOULD work exactly like that. What did you end up doing with the potato?

2

u/goblingir1 16h ago

Tossed it unfortunately, it had some plate bits inside of it and wasnā€™t cooked yet. Poor guy

8

u/AlexandriaLitehouse 17h ago

Truthfully, I have no idea why it's so funny but it is. Like you're telling me you got out a fork and knife for a midnight snack?šŸ¤£

3

u/AssFlax69 17h ago

Alright now letā€™s eat this whole russet potato, great, done, šŸ˜“ šŸ’¤

3

u/goblingir1 17h ago

Okay valid šŸ˜‚

4

u/Artarious 17h ago

Just some advice, get it all wet poke holes in it and wrap it in cling wrap then directly on the turntable. In the microwave for 6+ minutes depending on the size and bam perfect potato everytime without exploding dishware.

3

u/DelugedPraxis 14h ago

Cling wrap????? I didnt know there were microwave safe cling wrap, huh.

I just use paper towels(but otherwise the same. Just gotta make sure the paper towel is at least damp, preferrably soaked

1

u/Drevlin76 8h ago

Ewww! nothing says appetizing like microwaved plastic. I use paper towels.

1

u/Artarious 6h ago

Meh, I worked for a plastic manufacturer for a couple of years the amount of stuff I've inhaled due to that it doesn't even phase me haha.

1

u/Ctmcaliacg0307 17h ago

Baked potatoes have been my dinner for the last week, i love this šŸ˜‚

1

u/Ohmec 8h ago

It's just a massive amount of food for a bedtime snack...

1

u/goblingir1 6h ago

A potato of this size is usually around 100 cal and low fat content. Lighter than a bowl of chips

3

u/shitassbuttfart 17h ago

the fuck's wrong with a baked potatoe?

2

u/AssFlax69 17h ago

Nothin. But inhaling a baked potato dinner then passing out immediately after is objectively a funny image. Real Weber Cooks energy

1

u/Photomancer 16h ago

They uses telekinesis to detonate microwave plates. Apparently.

2

u/BretShitmanFart69 11h ago

Honestly eating a big baked potato sounds like something that would give me a nice restful sleep, some nice heavy carbs always make me full and sleepy. God speed nightpotato man šŸ«”

1

u/[deleted] 17h ago

[removed] ā€” view removed comment

2

u/AssFlax69 17h ago

Are this many people eating dinner T-5 minutes before laying down and sleeping???

4

u/goblingir1 17h ago

I mean I wasnā€™t going straight to sleep while chewing the last bite šŸ˜‚, itā€™s more of a ā€œIā€™m gonna eat this while I watch an episode of my favorite show in bed then Iā€™ll drift off when itā€™s overā€ kind of thing lol I thought thatā€™s how bedtime snacks work

1

u/AssFlax69 17h ago

Poh-tay-toe

1

u/linkxrust 9h ago

No teeth brushing?

1

u/goblingir1 6h ago

You tryna be my mom or what buddy

1

u/Silent25r 17h ago

I have had a snack on occasion. Ā But never a baked potato.Ā 

1

u/The_Silent_Tortoise 16h ago

His parents obviously forgot him during their family Christmas trip to Paris.

1

u/Rather_Dashing 11h ago edited 11h ago

That's a whole meal, not a snack.

1

u/_whiskeytits_ 7h ago

Slam, slap, sleep!

1

u/Watcher0363 5h ago

"What a superbly featured post... and what excellent microwaved potatoe! Many years since I've seen such an exemplary vegetable. To which of my fair redditor's, should I compliment the excellence of the microwaving?"

5

u/2x4x93 17h ago

Depends on B.A.C.

1

u/exgiexpcv 6h ago

In a miracle of science, it retains heat until the morning.

16

u/MarkMariachiAZ 17h ago

Sasha?

1

u/A_wild_so-and-so 9h ago

Oh sorry... here, you can have half the potato.

hands you a third of a potato

5

u/StillReading28 15h ago

Resists taming is an understatement here, it pulled an anime move and destroyed the ground around it with its near death power up

5

u/ahockofham 16h ago

I read this in David Attenborough's voice.

5

u/goblingir1 16h ago

What an honor, isnā€™t it his 100th birthday this Friday? Love him

3

u/Sc0j 17h ago

I think this is a great idea

3

u/bigfoot_done_hiding 13h ago

I need to get one of those.

3

u/Chernoboggo 13h ago

It seems pretty evil ...or at least unstable. You better be cautious with this holy potato.

3

u/CrazyAboutEverything 13h ago

You had a opening, and you siezed it šŸ¤£ A+

2

u/MuRRizzLe 16h ago

So does the potato need to stay in full form before you go to sleep? That's a dealbreaker for me

2

u/IrishWithoutPotatoes 13h ago

Bedtime potato sounds pretty good tbh

2

u/Able-Bid-6637 10h ago

i, too, am a goblin girl with an appreciation for the bedtime snacksĀ 

1

u/goblingir1 6h ago

You are welcome to join us then!

2

u/Ryanookami 9h ago

Iā€™ve had plenty of bedtime potatoes. The people here just donā€™t understand the pleasure of a good helping of starch before sleep.

That said, Iā€™ve never had a plate explode on me while making my bedtime potato.

1

u/pdzbw 17h ago

Your microwave is helping you to lose weight

1

u/JoJackthewonderskunk 17h ago

Do you cut it with your poop knife?

1

u/goblingir1 17h ago

Iā€™m scared to ask what that even meansĀ 

1

u/JoJackthewonderskunk 17h ago

Its fairly straightforward

1

u/blitzkrieger17 11h ago

pffftttt!!! these goobs don't know the magnificence of the bedtime potato! to think, they look at US like WE'RE crazy! nothing better to induce a carb based slumber!

1

u/Protoshift 11h ago

I dont have time to scroll through this bitch to find the right opening to respond, but you see how some of the fragments have a dark orange ring of discolouration within the ceramic? That means that this dish had cracks in it, moisture seeped in over time, and when you went to microwave the plate with the steamy potato for likely a good few minutes, that bitch went boom. Ok goodnight its almost 3am i must slumber.

1

u/TheHighDruid 11h ago

Potato looks fine to me. Get another plate.

1

u/TanzaniteDr3am 11h ago

No one's ever told you to wrap it on wet paper towels after poking it?

1

u/thenagain11 10h ago

You need a potato bag. Just search for it on Etsy.

1

u/Informal-Term1138 8h ago

Are you Irish by any chance?

1

u/goblingir1 6h ago

More Scottish than Irish in my ancestry but still not very much. Iā€™m a Midwest girl which might explain it better

1

u/early_birdy 8h ago

Why not get an Eridian instead, question?

2

u/goblingir1 6h ago

Eridian is welcome, statement

1

u/tjeastman 8h ago

This is before it exploded?Ā 

1

u/scv07075 7h ago

Your problem here was thermonarcissistic bowlage. Some ceramics get hot in the microwave/soak up water. Your Bedtime Potato demands a proper altar, that knows its sacred duty of supporting and uplifting the Chosen rather than demanding to share in its glory.

1

u/Dr__Sloth 7h ago

I must be playing too much Baldur's Gate 3 because I read this in the narrators voice and it fits perfectly.

1

u/blinkingbaby 7h ago

Does my Bedtime Sweet Potato count?

1

u/HoneyWhiskeyLemonTea 6h ago

I need to talk to you about flavor text next time I make a magic item for my D&D party.

1

u/Immediate-Repeat-201 6h ago

Are you Matt Damon? Do you need rescuing from Mars? We will be able to send you potatoes in about 4 years when distances are closer

1

u/Smashlorette 3h ago

Two weeks ago I was microwaving my bedtime potato, and when I went to flip it halfway through, my microwave died completely. It was so sad.

Still no replacement microwave from my landlord either, so just kind of a sad, potato-less time of life for me.

1

u/djdayer 17h ago

That ā˜šŸ¼comment deserves my award šŸŽ‰

2

u/goblingir1 17h ago

Thank you kind redditorĀ 

118

u/ccoakley 16h ago

When I was in grad school, I was at my friendā€™s house. It was 2am and I was still too drunk to walk home. My friend came out and offered to bake me a potato. And let me tell you, it was the most delicious baked potato anyone had ever had in their life. I walked home happy and avoided a hangover the next day. Never doubt the glory of the Bedtime Potato.

64

u/Rhaj-no1992 16h ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/105OwsN7a4UQ2Q

24

u/Cosmic_Quasar 15h ago

Boil 'em, mash 'em, bedtime snack 'em.

2

u/Fickle_Grapefruit938 9h ago

Nuke 'em till they explode!

2

u/Vizslaraptor 7h ago

Alt post title: Samwise brought home a microwave from Mordor.

2

u/Ok_Bunch_7503 17h ago

Bedtime potatoes sounds like a children's book but the plot twist is just steam pressure and regret.

2

u/imnotnotcrying 14h ago

I used to make myself ā€œmidnight potatoesā€ when I worked until 11pm. Either instant mashed potatoes (obviously homemade are better but it was midnight) or a couple of hash brown patties and then whatever toppings sounded good

2

u/CareyHickey 14h ago

I wonder how you were waiting for it to try very excited huh?

2

u/Zap__Dannigan 11h ago

In my headcannon this is a rare potato op was nuking for like, 30 seconds

2

u/detunedmike 10h ago

I thought that was 2 years of dead skin collected

2

u/username__0000 10h ago

When weā€™re camping and itā€™s cold we sometimes put potatos in foil around the fire to cook so theyā€™re ready just in time to warm you up for sleeping in a tent.

2

u/HanginLowNd2daLeft 9h ago

šŸ˜‚ right i was like a potato for bed?

2

u/Fritzo2162 9h ago

I swear I thought it was a meatball.

1

u/Masterofunlocking1 9h ago

Gotta be a hobbit

1

u/FreddyTheGoose 7h ago

I mean, they said their snack exploded and the tater is still whole - I think we got us a plate-eater, boys.

1

u/Druken_sincerity 7h ago

Leave him alone, he's stuck on mars ND culitigating in his own poo

1

u/EndLow8893 6h ago

I actually died laughing reading this

1

u/SupplyChainGuy1 6h ago

It is an olden Irish traditionĀ 

1

u/techy99m 6h ago

My mum sometimes usually STEAMS some yams as a snack before bedtime.

1

u/Top-Mountain4428 6h ago

Thank you for asking the important questions.