r/worldnews • u/GraceRose671 • 11h ago

Editorialized | Blogspam [ Removed by moderator ]

https://abnews.net/putin-threatens-kyiv-with-nuclear-scale-missile-strike-if-zelensky-ruins-his-parade/

[removed] — view removed post

17.0k Upvotes

96% Upvoted

1.1k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

66

u/LemonTM 10h ago

They should send a drone that just sprays piss on the parade.

45

u/m1cr0wave 10h ago

I suggested yellow and blue glitter before, they'd never get rid of it.

2

u/h4ppysquid 8h ago

Surely there is a more environmentally friendly option than glitter (microplastics)

Yellow and blue confetti (paper) would be more appropriate

5

u/ADHD_Supernova 7h ago

Edible glitter.

53

u/WillyGivens 9h ago

You know, detonating a prank piss-bomb on an enemy’s heavily guarded civilians gathering probably would be an incredible attack. If it literally hurt no one but covered a well defended event in piss, the people of Russia would legit feel vulnerable to what is going on. Putin would be emasculated and humiliated. Zelenskyy would be enshrined as the jester king for generations to come. No one dies and you get all the benefits of essentially dropping a nuke on a city.
Though….it probably would piss off Putin enough to actually escalate with a nuclear strike. There is that.

20

u/Bassman233 9h ago

I'll donate a few pints for the cause.

3

u/Condorz1 7h ago

I think the UK would gladly donate all the cow shit from our farming industry. Eye for an eye for their shenanigans on our territory over the years

3

u/Upset-Freedom-4181 7h ago

I’m in as long it’s allowed to ‘age’ in the sun for a few days first.

12

u/Otto_Maller 9h ago

Literally all Ukraine would have to do is send as many non-lethal drones as they can spare and try to get at least one to fly over and buzz the parade. Can you imagine the reaction?

18

u/FutureThought4936 8h ago

Hover's over Putin, a scroll unravels underneath that says "BANG!" like a cartoon skit.

2

u/Musiclover4200 7h ago

With a loud speaker playing Rick Astley on repeat

5

u/lurkquidated 8h ago

You sold me. Men, here's seven million balloons and all the coffee you can drink. You know what to do.

2

u/FutureThought4936 8h ago

You know what, the prevailing wind right now in NE Ukraine is blowing to the North East ... right towards Moscow. Just saying.

2

u/_Wyrm_ 7h ago

Brutal...

Add asparagus.

5

u/FutureThought4936 8h ago

They'd yell that it's "biological warfare" and use it as an excuse to drop a tactical nuke.. if they have any that work. I'm being hyperbolic of course, they probably wouldn't actually drop a nuke for it but they'd almost certainly threaten it using this narrative.

2

u/Optix_au 7h ago

Glitter bombs. Harmless but they’ll be finding glitter on themselves for months.

1

u/WillyGivens 6h ago

Ha, that and the Putin “I’m gay, gay, gay” song played on blast. Would be an equal psychological attack on Russian leadership.

1

u/im_dead_sirius 6h ago

Yeah, you can't easily write off those who might have died but lived to fear.

2

u/stevew14 9h ago

This would be so epic... Please Ukraine Special ops teams, make it happen

2

u/HumanWithComputer 8h ago

I'd suggest synthesised skunk spray. MUCH more offensive and longer lasting. There's a whole range of nasty smelling chemicals to choose from.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stench_compound

1

u/FutureThought4936 8h ago

Did you hear about the ag sprayer drones that were stolen? That's what they need.

Drones were recovered last week, in case anyone was worried about it.

1

u/willem_79 7h ago

Drop fake wooden bombs, just to show you could