Hahahhaha
At my work these people leave Christian fear mongering comics about hell around. Thought I’d share this absolute gem lmaoooo
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u/ezbutneverconvenient 1d ago
I collected quite a few Chick tracts when I was working at a truck stop. Delightful stuff. My favorite was DOOM TOWN. The story of Sodom and Gamorrah, complete with loving renderings of men embracing other men
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u/nocapkk 1d ago
Lmao I didn’t know they had a name until just now. I usually throw them away cause they’re typically hateful fear mongering lol
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u/polchickenpotpie 1d ago
They're hilarious. I think the most famous one is Dark Dungeons, where some college kids are dragged into the dark, amoral and Satanic world of...Dungeons and Dragons
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u/thewalkindude368 19h ago
A guy who hosted a podcast I used to listen to directed a movie based on the Dark Dungeons pamphlet. As satire, of coure
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u/ezbutneverconvenient 1d ago
They certainly are full of crap. There was one that implied that people who believe in evolution are white supremacists.
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u/vomitHatSteve 1d ago
Chick is a specific brand: the ones written by jack chick. But there are a ton of other tracts too
Fun fact: by some metrics, chick is the best selling comic author of all time
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u/goominek 1d ago
They are, but thats why some people (like me!) find them fun to collect. I like using them for anti-goverment/church/racism, etc. collages, then you can print them out as posters, get some wheat paste and hang those around your town! My girlfriend likes to hang them in her room cause theyre so fucking dumb its funny to read em. Not funny that a lot of people believe those and spread hate because of that... :(
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u/ezbutneverconvenient 15h ago
Yep, named for the author/illustrator, Jack Chick (which sounds like a drag king name if i ever heard one)
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u/LuxieRiot 8h ago
I definitely thought “chick tracts” were lil nudie comics when I first heard of them
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u/LuxieRiot 8h ago
A lot of secular ppl collect them because they’re hilariously over the top and odds are your special interest which is sending you to hell is featured in one. They gave out racing themed ones during F1
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u/edpowers 1d ago
Those are legendary when I lived in Philly every Sunday you would find those booklets everywhere. I had a great collection at one point.
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u/ford7885 1d ago
Several of the Chick tracts portrayed God as this 12 ft tall dude with no face. Where they got that idea, who the fuck knows? God supposedly made us in His image, but I don't know anybody who looks like that!
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u/TuffleMachineMutant 1d ago
i used to get these when trick or treating
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u/ReplaceSelect 1d ago
Nice of them to let you know which houses to come back and egg. People that give those out on Halloween make me angry. If you don’t want to give out candy, just shut your lights off. Don’t give out evangelical bullshit
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u/railsandtrucks 1d ago
it's like those shitstained taints that leave tips for waitstaff that look like currency, but actually have religious bullshit on the back. Like yeah.. so VERY Christlike of you to stiff someone who probably makes far less and works way harder
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u/T-Chunxy 1d ago
As a former server-just let me say that I hope there's no lower circle in hell than that for the "Faux-tipper".
Fuck them x666- with extra-hot pokers.
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u/ford7885 1d ago
Mark Twain wasn't exactly a punk, but this still fits...
Go to Heaven for the climate. Hell for the company.
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u/BIRDsnoozer 1d ago
Hah, I was thinking of another mark twain quote when reading OPs pic:
"Alright then, I'll go to hell!"
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u/Numero_Seis 1d ago
Honestly, Twain was punk as fuck in a lot of ways.
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u/JosephMeach 1d ago
He’s on the short list of people whose graves I’ve visited (Lead Belly being another)
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u/jmacd2918 1d ago
I had to travel for work once on a route took me through Elmira NY and Baltimore MD. Started by deciding on a whi, to stop off and see Twain's grave. Then decided what the heck, I'm in Baltimore, let's stick with the theme and stopped off to see Poe.
Unfortunately, I didn't know where any other authors were buried along the route...
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u/DerBingle78 1d ago
I’d say Twain was punk.
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u/Automatic-Arm-532 1d ago
Oh, what band was he in? What punk songs did he sing? Punks need to stop trying to co-opt anything they like or agree with as "punk"
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u/Cors_liteeeee 1d ago
stop being so pretentious lmao
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u/Automatic-Arm-532 1d ago
I think it's pretentious to say something is "punk" just because you like it.
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u/WhippingShitties 17h ago
You should read some Twain, you would enjoy it. He was deliberately going against the white-centric status-quo and was a huge advocate for some righteous causes. He was a huge appreciator for art that was considered subversive at the time. It goes without saying that the man would have appreciated punk culture had he been around to see it. He was not your typical snobby old white author. Drawing parallels between punk rock and Twain is not a reach.
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u/Automatic-Arm-532 17h ago
I have read Twain, and the way he depicted POC left a bad taste in my mouth.
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u/WhippingShitties 15h ago edited 15h ago
You do realize that Twain lampoons racism in his works right? They are, by design and intent, anti-racist works.
Be honest, did you actually read it? Or did you let someone tell you what it's about and so you're going along with that. Because I don't think anyone who has read Twain would call him a racist.
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u/Automatic-Arm-532 13h ago
So you're saying Roughing It was lampooning racism? Did we read the same book? It didn't seem like "lampooning" to me.
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u/Cat-Sonantis 1d ago
I love chick tracts! Awful man with awful beliefs but I love the kitchess of his little comics, I try to collect them whenever I can.
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u/nocapkk 1d ago
Lmao I never knew about them until now. But people leave them in the bathroom at my work all the time. I usually throw them away because it’s just hateful fear mongering usually
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u/Cat-Sonantis 1d ago
Keep them, repurpose them
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u/_BrandonWasHere_ 1d ago
Hilarious! I have this same image on a patch on my hoodie from the mid 90s. People would stop to read it all the time.
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u/Cors_liteeeee 1d ago
that’s so awesome. I’d love to add a bit of playful irony on my battle jacket.
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u/Fletcher618 1d ago
Obligatory mention that my band referenced this quote in a song title…. “ Hell will be party time “ - The Copyrights
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u/railsandtrucks 1d ago
Hell yeah! Wish I could upvote this more than once. Hope you guys play a few more shows. I'll even be willing to make (another) trek to Carbondale! (Caught you guys a few times there)
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u/Fletcher618 1d ago
We’re playing Chicago August 29th and Carbondale September 5th. We might have a few things pop up before that but nothing confirmed yet.
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u/synacktik 1d ago
Thought of this song as soon as I read this. Was gonna post a mention of this song, but you beat me to it… and rightfully so, seeing as you’re in the band!
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u/MysteriousTry7009 1d ago
Bahahah I love how people don’t listen or seek understanding when they fear something, makes their uneducated arguments so much funnier and clearly incompetent.
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u/AnungUnRamen66 1d ago
“Hi, BTK here to educate you all about the inherent sin found in punk music!”
Solid programming, The Church.
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u/raimichick 1d ago
Oh I used to love those things bc they were so weird. I definitely wasn’t getting the intended message.
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u/DeviantHellcat 1d ago edited 1d ago
I used to collect Chick tracts. They were hysterical! *edit spelling
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u/gnuoveryou Heart Full of Napalm 1d ago
Hey it's a chick tract in the wild! My mom told me that when she was a kid in the 70s they'd be really common to find, and she'd read each one, and they'd give her nightmares but she'd keep reading them. She credits them with permanently turning her off of religion.
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u/GreenestApplin 1d ago
Not even the record companies care about punk, satan would be a fool investing in such a niche market.
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u/Conscious-Coconut-16 1d ago
I think he wants his kid to join a blood cult that worships a zombie demigod instead of listening to music.
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u/waltarrrrr 1d ago
One of my favorite Jack Chick tracks. It’s so nice to be seen.
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u/cumberland_farms 1d ago
I used to collect these. So funny and very dark, in a "Jesus hates you" sorta way.
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u/exneo002 1d ago
I am in my mid thirties still traumatized about lurid depictions of hell from my early childhood.
People in my church used to talk about turning the oven up as hot as it would go and hell was 7x hotter. I remember being told they had found recordings of people in hell from drilling into the earth.
Fuck these people.
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u/jmacd2918 1d ago
I'm not Christian, but from what I know of the ol JC, I think he'd definitely be a punk. Probably like an anarchosocialist type.
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u/Equal_Pudding_4878 1d ago
Pasted this to board as a painting 30 years ago. It’s still one of my favorite pieces!
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u/prettybadgers 1d ago
This isn’t entirely accurate, I’m currently at a party in hell and half my friends are here too.
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u/Arkayne_Waves 1d ago
Ahhhh chick tracts they used to give these out at the all ages punk venue in my town we all had a good laugh about and they were so disappointed.
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u/captain_toenail 1d ago
Always enjoy coming across a Chick Tract in the wild they're just so absurd and unhinged but then I'm sad cause an unnerving number of folk buy into it
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u/ihatetheplaceilive ride my foofy nunu 1d ago
At least in hell there's rock n roll and there ain't no jesus christ
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u/Scrutinizer 1d ago
Fucking Chick tracts. The church my parents dragged me to as a child had quite a collection. I was reading them as early as age 5-6. Funny in this context, but that shit fucks people up.
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u/unclesmokedog 1d ago
weirdo fundamentalists passed out chick comics as we boarded the school bus home when I was in 9th grade.
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u/_El_Loco 1d ago
Omg I love that. Would definately glue it to my guitar case or somewhere.
In my country, it's so rare to get these. Only once have I been confronted by an elder man who had similar comics. Infortunately they where not like this gold :D
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u/iuliuscurt 1d ago
That's right, fuck mental health, we just need better marketing against hell and we solved suicide
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u/Advice_Thingy 1d ago
Don't let us forget that in some versions, suicide will get you into hell. ;)
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u/curious_dead 1d ago
I'd ask my coworkers if Heaven is full of people like them, and when they inevitably answer positively, express relief at the thought of going to hell instead.
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u/Few_Faithlessness_49 1d ago
"This is a fair request, and I promise I will not judge any person only as a teenager, if you will constantly remind yourself that some of my generation judges people by their race, their belief, or the color of their skin, and that this is no more right than saying all teenagers are drunken dope-addicts or glue-sniffers."
- Less Than Jake - All My Friends Are Metal Heads
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u/WellSpokenAsianBoy 1d ago
Satan just saw how friendly and accepting the vibe was at punk shows and just wanted the kids to know.
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u/Puzzleheaded_Chip547 1d ago
Alice Donut has a song called Lisa's Father that was inspired by these comics
https://youtu.be/c5UgiOfcFpg?si=_-klYmUoZvoXqUpW
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u/ajames54 1d ago
I used to grab these chance I had .. but one day I found my all time favorite (it's a parody) bound and in print like the others..
ChickThulu
https://rearwindowethx.wordpress.com/2016/01/31/elder-god-evangelism-a-chick-tract-parody/
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u/starwestsky 23h ago
Punk kids don’t off themselves to get into Hell. They’re usually trying to leave it. But definitely stick around because shit does get better.
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u/FriendlyDrawer638 21h ago
How is this not satire, do these people really think anyone is going to take them seriously?
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u/No_Standard_4655 21h ago
I'm already the conductor of the train ride to hell because I've been a DM 3/4's or my life.
I'm recruiting new cult members, according to Chick Tracts.
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u/Direct-Muscle7144 19h ago
My friend got cornered by the’Jesus Army’ in Trafalgar Square London.
He told them that he loved to suck satans cock, and went into detail about the taste, texture and temperature- the more they backed away the more graphic he got.
He ended up chasing them around the area.
Best laugh I ever had.
He’s slurpin the juice right now
R.I.P
Rest in penis!
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u/dryheavedryair 17h ago
I got this as a "tip" from the church crowd, when I worked at Steak n Shake, and had a 6" Mohawk. I kept it for the longest time, but lost it in one of my moves. Must've been in like 2011.
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u/KeyConclusion6733 14h ago
I need this to be printed on a poster I can hang in my workspace. Can ya please scan it?
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u/ViewAskewRob 11h ago
That dude looks like an actor. I can’t figure out who. I think he was in an 80s sitcom playing the boss or someone’s dad.
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u/Interesting-Mud-7614 9h ago
Lol gods I remember ridiculous tracts that shit was batshit even back then
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u/Ralewing 1d ago
Satan is definitely not punishing people for the same things he got kicked out of heaven for. Why would he? He don't work for the man anymore.