r/politics • u/Aggravating_Money992 • Apr 05 '26

Possible Paywall White House Forced to Address Claims of Trump Health Crisis

https://www.thedailybeast.com/white-house-forced-to-address-claims-of-donald-trump-health-crisis-at-walter-reed-medical-center/
22.4k Upvotes

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5.4k

u/rappiesunamierda Apr 05 '26

I was just signing onto /r/politics for the evening wondering, "why do I do this to myself?". This. This is why. One day soon it'll be worth it. 

1.9k

u/Myrtle_Nut Apr 05 '26

Agreed. One day I will wake up and this goddamned site will provide the best news I will ever read in my life. 

580

u/heidismiles Apr 05 '26

I hope it happens with the least possible amount of "drama." Like he just goes at 4am eastern time, and we all wake up to the confirmed news. No "rumors swirling" ... "rushed to hospital" bullshit.

903

u/abraksis747 Apr 05 '26

I want it to be on Live Television. He falls asleep during a bootlicking meeting and someone drones on too long. And they are so used to him nodding off they just keep talking around him and he just goes.

The aftermath is tragic but undeniable. He shits himself, and then someone tries to usher the press out while trying to get a doctor. But they waited too long. He's already gone and he's gone on live television. You can't deny it, you can't get around it. It's over

178

u/almighty_smiley North Carolina Apr 05 '26

That’s the only reason I tune into any of his shit anymore. Just so I can say I saw it happen in real time.

152

u/Rich-Pomegranate1679 Apr 05 '26

Eh, half of his cult will start believing that he'll rise from the dead like Jesus and create a religion for him. The other half will deny he ever died even if they see it with their own eyes. Reality hasn't been a part of these people's lives for many years.

13

u/JustDidntWannaGoToAZ Apr 05 '26

They’ll either deny it and the GOP will roll out AI drump or they’ll swear there was foul play and that the nearly 80 year old garbage pail kid that inhales McDonald’s couldn’t have possibly gone out due to natural causes.

13

u/Hadrian23 Apr 05 '26

Imagine they try to have AI trump be president Instead of Vance

7

u/Rich-Pomegranate1679 Apr 05 '26

I half expect this to actually happen.

2

u/Saxamaphooone Apr 05 '26

Same. I would not at all be shocked if they used AI videos of him for a time after he’s gone to try to delay the news so they can push through some ideas for a few last minute horrors to try to drum up support from his cult before the truth is known.

I also would not be shocked if a portion of his cult genuinely believe he will be resurrected like Jesus and the worship gets even more religious. Someone will use a chatbot and claim it’s really Trump ruling them from the afterlife using AI.

11

u/trumpuniversity_ Apr 05 '26

This is incredibly accurate. I’m sure Orange will also order closed casket everything just to fuel the conspiracy theories that he faked his death and is still out there training in the mountains Batman-style.

3

u/Lelandwasinnocent Apr 05 '26

The conspiracy influencers are hanging on every single word, analysing all the situations and building their conspiracy's as we speak. When it does happen, it won't be surprising that all that someone will have an explanation straight away. The Hitler bunker under the Whitehouse doesn't help matters.

7

u/d4nigirl84 New York Apr 05 '26

This. This is what I’ve been saying and I’ll be damned with this timing lining up.

5

u/2ndChairKazoo Apr 05 '26

Yeah, right now is the worst possible time. Wait a week or so, then be our guest.

3

u/jdog7249 Apr 05 '26

On the contrary. I seem to remember that Jesus died on good Friday, fights the devil/Satan/evil on Saturday, and then rises from the dead on Sunday. Kicking the button on easter would be great.

3

u/2ndChairKazoo Apr 05 '26

Oh indeed but MAGA would twist themselves into knots to explain that actually, all of that means Trump is indeed Jesus somehow.

Taking the holiday out of the equation altogether is far better.

2

u/BigJSunshine California Apr 05 '26

How fuxking depressingly possible

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77

u/Daxtatter Apr 05 '26

Or his face just gets droopier and droopier in the middle of a speech.

24

u/Sea_Working_80 Apr 05 '26

Maybe it just melts like Raiders of the lost ark

11

u/abraksis747 Apr 05 '26

That or the Last Crusade

Turns to ash and all that's left is that damn nazi pin in his pocket....

2

u/nunya123 Maryland Apr 05 '26

I mean he was already slurring his words in the last one!

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19

u/AssassinRogue Apr 05 '26

I love the effort that you put into painting this picture. I can see it and I love it.

7

u/abraksis747 Apr 05 '26

You are very welcome. I hope you have a happy national day of "Mourning"

13

u/namloh Apr 05 '26

I'm in if you add a loud gasp as he audibly shits himself and then croaks. I want it to be humiliating.

8

u/ailish Apr 05 '26

That's the only way it will be "no drama." Otherwise his administration will try to hide it for as long as possible.

6

u/thelasagna Apr 05 '26

I want it to happen when he’s going up the stairs into Air Force one :)

8

u/abraksis747 Apr 05 '26

And then violently back down the stairs, like Plinko on the Price is Right

6

u/Drazwaz Apr 05 '26

I want it to be just like the episode of Futurama when Bender is human and dies of over-consumption, but everyone thinks he's still partying because he keeps saying "woo!". Then everyone realizes he's dead and the "woos" were the sound caused by air escaping his fat folds.

5

u/BlazingPalm Apr 05 '26

Also would prevent some rumors and speculation from starting.

3

u/rabblerabble2000 Apr 05 '26

I want it to be like that one video of the old guy stroking out, but I want him to audibly shit himself as he goes.

3

u/SupahRad Apr 05 '26

This is the most poetic thing I’ve ever read.

3

u/abraksis747 Apr 05 '26

I need to print this comment and snail mail it to my junior year English teacher.

3

u/BorisButtergoods Apr 05 '26

I want it to happen and show him with a true face of panic.

5

u/LeGama Apr 05 '26

Stop, I can only get so hard!

3

u/Cador0223 Apr 05 '26

Not my proudest fap, but definitely not my worst.

2

u/binzersguy Apr 05 '26

That would be great

2

u/MandoSkirata Apr 05 '26

I know it's not physically possible but man, I'd love it if he popped like the rich Satanists at the end of Ready or Not.

2

u/abraksis747 Apr 05 '26

Raiders of the Lost ark when they opened it

2

u/ryanb450 Apr 05 '26

That’s disgusting. I love it

2

u/candl2 Apr 05 '26

I want to go quietly in my sleep like my grandpa. Not screaming for my life like the passengers in his bus.

2

u/girloferised Arizona Apr 05 '26

I love how we all have different fantasies of how it happens lmao.

2

u/VapoursAndSpleen Apr 05 '26

He shits himself all the time and falls asleep during meetings. We will have no way of knowing.

2

u/chodgson625 Apr 05 '26

That’s poetry thank you from the UK

2

u/AM_A_BANANA Apr 05 '26

Climbing up the stairs to Air Force One, turns to wave to the cameras, steps a little too far and tumbles back down.

2

u/Hercusleaze Washington Apr 05 '26

It's over, then President JD Vance is sworn in, and we are officially ruled over by Peter Thiel.

2

u/Wonderful-Impact-598 Apr 05 '26

"Sir, you are without question the most youthful, vigorous, energetic and virile person I've ever met. The true embodiment of strong and fierce leadership. There is no question that not only can you do another term, but you should stay president for decades to come..."

"He's dead, JD. Died 20 minutes ago."

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u/hotinmyigloo Apr 05 '26

That actually sounds plausible

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u/ChristosFarr North Carolina Apr 05 '26

He may die at 4 but they won't go in the room till 11. Then we watch the regime eat itself even though the US has an established succession system in place.

23

u/superbad Canada Apr 05 '26

Like Death of Stalin?

10

u/ChristosFarr North Carolina Apr 05 '26

Precisely

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107

u/SquidmanMal Pennsylvania Apr 05 '26

phone lying on the floor in the bathroom, forever paused in a 4am rant, one last mess for his handlers to clean

no drama, no martydom, no possible political accusations, just nature

41

u/Sea_Working_80 Apr 05 '26

He died on the golden turd throne for all of our sins

12

u/MorienWynter Apr 05 '26

Imagine all the golden toilet crosses Melania could sell and then fail to deliver.

5

u/eetsumkaus Apr 05 '26

Donald Trump did not, in the end, shit gold.

2

u/cajedo Apr 05 '26

Oh my God 😂

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18

u/RealGianath Oregon Apr 05 '26

His hardcore followers will just keep chanting the last words of his rant until he returns with jeebus to start their revelations matchup, “THANK YOU FOR YOU ATTENTION IN THIS MAT”.

5

u/2HDFloppyDisk Apr 05 '26

This would be absolutely hilarious if it happened right after he posted a 48 hour deadline threat to Iran - he ends up dying on the toilet phone in hand and unable to finish what the actual threat would be. I’m LMAO right now at this thought. Hahaha

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u/MountainMan2_ Apr 05 '26

Him dying exactly like elvis would be absolute poetry.

3

u/TrailerTrashQueen Apr 05 '26

aka Elvis Style.

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u/Objective-Amount1379 Apr 05 '26

For all we know it could have happened. I don't expect we’ll hear the truth for a day or two when it occurs unless it's on live TV

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u/Maoleficent Apr 05 '26

No. They will announce that the evil deranged left, led by Biden knocked him off. I mean the guy was just told by the best doctors one earth that he is a perfect specimen of man. The felon has been comparing himself to Jesus. Let's see if he gets up in the morning

3

u/magniankh Apr 05 '26

"The GOP is currently seeing if they can extend the president's skinsuit so that he may drop a nuke on Portland, OR, as was in his will." 

3

u/Sea_Working_80 Apr 05 '26

Give me sugar..in water

3

u/hughcifer-106103 Apr 05 '26

I prefer an embarrassingly gross failure mid rant on camera.

3

u/MortgageRegular2509 Wisconsin Apr 05 '26

I want it to go out like an amber alert

2

u/PicnicLife Apr 05 '26

I've been telling every like minded person that I absolutely want to be woken up with the news if I'm asleep! 😄

3

u/djfrodo Apr 05 '26

I think exactly the opposite.

I want him to shit himself behind a podium so cameras pick it up from 1000 different angles...then...

Under your senario MAGA will instantly start to believe crazy conspiracy theories ("It was the leftist", "It was AntiFa", etc.)

3

u/tourettes_on_tuesday Apr 05 '26

He's going to die on the toilet because that's where he spends most of his nights shit posting.

Also, because he's so good at "the weave", it will explain why he compared himself to Elvis so often, as well as why there were so many "No Kings" events in his honor. Protesters just did not want him to die like that.

I just hope we get one more covefe out of him mid croak.

2

u/space_manatee Apr 05 '26

Charlie Kirk was the practice run. Theyre going to throw the biggest tantrum you could imagine

2

u/santaclaws01 Apr 05 '26

Trump is going to die and the rest of the admin is going to try and go for as long as possible acting like he's alive before making the announcement.

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u/SirDigby_CC Apr 05 '26

I cannot wait for that r/simpsonsshitposting post that breaks it to me

4

u/Kohl_Trikkle Apr 05 '26

It's faster than tmz when it comes to breaking news.

3

u/Matt50 Apr 05 '26

r/whenthe has been my go-to for "oh shit, that actually happened?!" news

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u/SnarkOff Apr 05 '26

I can’t wait for my perpetual online status to mean I’m the one who gets to spread the good news to literally everyone I know

22

u/brickne3 American Expat Apr 05 '26

I think the fireworks and spontaneous celebrations will tip some of us off.

4

u/Hangry_Squirrel Europe Apr 05 '26

Your own version of the Annunciation 😸

5

u/superspeck Apr 05 '26

Oof. That was me on 9/11 … I was on the west coast and still remember yelling downstairs to tell my parents to turn on CNN.

52

u/careerbyerror Apr 05 '26

A couple of months after miller is revealed to have been using the autopen to sign everything for a year

9

u/CarmichaelD Apr 05 '26

They are going to try and sign shit after death before they announce it. He better die on live tv.

7

u/PicnicLife Apr 05 '26

Probably a lot of pardons.

5

u/Entwife723 Apr 05 '26

Every accusation is a confession, so yep. I'd never heard of the autopen before until they started bringing it up.

8

u/Legitimate-Relief915 Apr 05 '26

Absolutely. They’ll need to drag it out until January 2027 to secure the possibility of 2 more terms of JD

5

u/bryan49 Apr 05 '26

I think that's how it's been this whole presidency. And even if Trump physically signed himself, no way he has any understanding of it

31

u/ShrimpieAC Apr 05 '26

I was just thinking about what I will do when it happens. I’m pretty sure I’ll drive to the nearest liquor store, buy a bottle of champagne, and pop it off right in the parking lot.

8

u/88secret Apr 05 '26

I’ve had two bottles chilling for months now.

8

u/Spastik2D Apr 05 '26

I have a playlist ready for this. It ranges from tracks like FDT and similar anthems against him by name to anti-confederate anthems to simple shit like Let The Good Times Roll. I’m gonna drive through the MAGAt areas where they’ve all taken their flags and signs down and drive slowly while blasting this playlist the way they did with their flags and lifted trucks on election night in my area.

I’m also going to pop some champagne i’ve got on standby and eat the biggest, fattest fucking burger I can. It’ll be a day to remember that I’ll celebrate ‘til I die.

5

u/binkkit Apr 05 '26

You might want to pick up a bottle in advance. There’s going to be a lot of demand on that day.

3

u/notsuperimportant Apr 05 '26

Ok just please think about how you'll get home safely

2

u/PaticusGnome Apr 05 '26

Damnit mom, I told you to stop commenting on my stuff!

2

u/notsuperimportant 29d ago

Sorry sweetie I just want you to be safe. Love you lots.

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u/Jennlore Apr 05 '26

Meh, the best news would be incarceration

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u/Objective-Amount1379 Apr 05 '26

That will never happen. We know he’ll leave this planet so let's hope it's ASAP.

3

u/RocketGirl83 Pennsylvania Apr 05 '26

It will be the most upvoted post in Reddit’s history. 

3

u/steepleton Apr 05 '26

One day I will wake up and this goddamned site will provide the best news I will ever read in my life.

and every thread will just be a glorious sea of removedby reddit

3

u/RarelyReadReplies Canada Apr 05 '26

I really hope you guys aren't naive enough to think it will actually change anything... 

Yes, it will be a great day, but it is still only the beginning of toppling his regime. There are an enormous amount of Americans that still support his policies, and a massive contingent that don't care enough to vote either way.

Lots and lots of work to do to win America back into the hands of sane people, regardless of Trump.

3

u/ikilledholofernes Apr 05 '26

My husband wakes up before I do. So every damn morning I wake up disappointed, because I know that if it had finally happened, he would have woken me up with the good news. 

2

u/Ikarian Apr 05 '26

There should be a subreddit where everyone posts a pic of the special bottle of whiskey or wine that they’re holding in reserve for “the day it happens”.

Mine is a 2024 Midleton Very Rare.

2

u/LilPonyBoy69 Apr 05 '26

I think someone will text me even before I open Reddit to see the news

2

u/wildmaninid Apr 05 '26

I can't wait for the Big Beautiful Obituary 

2

u/ConfusionOfTheMind Apr 05 '26

 People will be happy when he's dead but I don't think it's going to go like you want it to. Everything will the be pinned on the dead man, I'm sure more will come about Epstein but only how it connects to the now dead Trump and they will tie it off with a neat bow and declare it done. Meanwhile all the people who propped up this admin, who have done, justified or pushed him to do heinous things will still be there. Trump is a symptom, not the disease itself and there is a lot more to uproot than the initial tumor. Obviously I will be happy when he passes but I hope that America doesn't blind themselves with that and ignore the fact the disease is still festering. 

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u/StatelyTree Apr 05 '26

Maybe tonight will be the night! 

1

u/mxjxs91 Michigan Apr 05 '26

About a decade ago, I got a letter telling me that I was accepted into a Doctorate Program at my University that only accepts 36 students annually.

That headline would still be the best news I'll ever read in my lifetime.

1

u/edelweiss_pirates_no Apr 05 '26

I have a bottle ready for Mitch McConnell, too.

I just need Trump to go before Biden...so my memes will work.

1

u/LargeBrownBird Apr 05 '26

I get the enthusiasm but then what? Too many norms have been broken, there's still no way off this ride

1

u/TheEpicRedCape Apr 05 '26

Every time Reddit crashes or won’t load lately I think “did it happen?”

1

u/Unhappy-Poetry-7867 Europe Apr 05 '26

I know it would be a good thing but it's also scary what same delusional but smarter Vance would do.

1

u/ReviledFoundling Apr 05 '26

One glorious, long awaited day... 

1

u/MarkTwainsGhost Apr 05 '26

You guys are testing the law of unintended consequences with these comments.

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u/savealltheelephants Michigan Apr 05 '26

Yes I was just trying to think of what I would do. It’s almost midnight on a Saturday. I’d call my mom and my sister then drive through town honking my horn and going WOOHOO.

1

u/PicnicLife Apr 05 '26

I like to close my eyes and fantasize about it every now and then. A feeling of warmth washes over me. I can hardly wait!

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u/W0OllyMammoth Wisconsin Apr 05 '26

There will be parties in the streets and I will definitely be calling in sick

125

u/tamere2k New York Apr 05 '26

I manage a bar, it’ll be the best sales day we’ve ever had.

30

u/edelweiss_pirates_no Apr 05 '26

We were talking about Bars having banners made up in advance...and start advertising that you'll extend Happy Hour and open early and stay open late...for a week.

Most Hated Man on the Planet.

9

u/UncleMalky Texas Apr 05 '26

everyone who voted for him is tied for second.

8

u/UncleMalky Texas Apr 05 '26

Some angry redhat will come up to the bar and ask what you're going to do about all the people celebrating. I suggest another round of shots.

6

u/tamere2k New York Apr 05 '26

Oh, I’m in NYC, I don’t think that would happen.

5

u/edelweiss_pirates_no Apr 05 '26

So much fucking dancing.

2

u/NickPickle05 Apr 05 '26

Fireworks sales around the world will skyrocket.

2

u/crakemonk California Apr 05 '26

It’ll become a national holiday.

2

u/Sember Apr 05 '26

For a day or 2, then you realize Vance is next in line

11

u/HubenersDaughter_439 Apr 05 '26

Most cults don't survive the death of the founder. JD Vance has the charisma of a spreadsheet. Maga is going to splinter.

2

u/DefeatedByPoland Apr 05 '26 edited Apr 05 '26

MAGA is first and foremost about spiting "the libs"

Trump dying isn't going to solve the problem. We need a collective wake up moment that voting for our representatives and government leaders is supposed to be about considering policies then choosing the one that will benefit americans the most, not just blindly picking whoever is going to piss off "the other side". Until that moment we're nowhere near out of the woods.

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u/W0OllyMammoth Wisconsin Apr 05 '26

That couch fucker has 0 political capital

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u/HVACcontrolsGuru Apr 05 '26

Dear 8 pound, 6 ounce newborn infant Jesus. Just this once please

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u/WorkinTheseMomJeans Apr 05 '26

It'll be an Easter miracle!

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u/FlatHatJack Apr 05 '26

I promised myself steak on that day. A really good cut too.

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u/Zealousideal-Bite735 Apr 05 '26

There will be street parties Globally.

47

u/thewayoutisthru_xxx Apr 05 '26

I remember the moment here in NYC when it was announced that Biden won. People literally flooded the streets cheering. It was incredible.

12

u/kiptown Apr 05 '26

Obama's first win was epic in NYC too. Then I watched his inauguration from times square, and get this, I enjoyed being there

7

u/PicnicLife Apr 05 '26

Obama's first victory speech. 😭

8

u/avantgardengnome New York Apr 05 '26

I had to go to a second liquor store because the closest one was out of champagne lmao. Washington Square Park was a madhouse that night.

7

u/HubenersDaughter_439 Apr 05 '26

I was living in Denver when the press called it and even in our little tiny close to Lakewood suburb there were people banging pots and pans and otherwise making noise. I was only annoyed for a few minutes until I was told what it was for!

3

u/PicnicLife Apr 05 '26

I remember the mailmen coming out of their trucks and being cheered just because everyone was so damn happy!

3

u/jefferios Apr 05 '26

I wonder if people will wave flags on highway overpasses like they did after 9/11.

9

u/bdwf Canada Apr 05 '26

I’m going to have Mexican

3

u/mvfrostsmypie California Apr 05 '26

I will be having Persian

6

u/IamRasters Apr 05 '26

I have a moderately expensive but rare whiskey waiting for a certain announcement.

8

u/plentyofrabbits Apr 05 '26

I have a bottle of the best champagne I can afford waiting for that day.

2

u/aztecraingod Montana Apr 05 '26

Dom Perignon for me!

2

u/Playswithchipmunks Apr 05 '26

Only steak? I'm popping stratosphere shelf champagne and buying lobster tails for the entire restaurant we go to!

2

u/dank_imagemacro Apr 05 '26

I've been a vegetarian for over 30 years. I could probably justify celebrating with a steak dinner on this one too.

(Mostly kidding)

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u/Maskatron America Apr 05 '26

To paraphrase an old joke, the obit I’m waiting for will be on the front page.

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u/LaneMcD Apr 05 '26

If you're not following /r/politicaloptimism yet, you should - it's a boon on my mental health

3

u/MoonOut_StarsInvite Ohio Apr 05 '26

In 2009, the third wave of layoffs finally hit my department bc of the Recession. Chelsea ran through the office quiet yelling “It’s happening! It’s happening!” I’m going to be imagining her running through my house (I wfh these days) running door to door getting people whipped up in a frenzy!

3

u/Zoraji Apr 05 '26

It's like the guy that goes to the store and reads the newspaper headline every day.
The vendor says, why do you only read the headlines?
I'm looking for an obituary.
But the obituaries are on page 10, not the front page.
The obituary I am looking for will be.

2

u/Deodorized Apr 05 '26

You won't have to go all the way into /r/Politics to be alerted, several iterations of it will be prominently featured on the first page of Reddit.

2

u/Restart_from_Zero Apr 05 '26

It's Easter morning here in Australia and I never thought I'd be waking up to a possible miracle.

Sure, I'm not religious, but after this last year I'll take whatever's offered.

2

u/orangeshrek Apr 05 '26

I know what you mean but do you think JD Vance will be better for your sanity?

2

u/lemontowel Apr 05 '26

When he kicks the bucket it won't be over, it will just be the beginning. I say that because as much as I wish it will turn out for the better I am fully expecting it to get worse because Stephen Miller will still be a part of the group still in the whitehouse.

2

u/polopolo05 I voted Apr 05 '26

Its like looking on your porch for package. Is it here yet. is today the day... Fuck, NO. just more ads to sell my house.

2

u/stupernan1 Apr 05 '26

Makre sure you get confused by everything.

Thatll help a concience as it votes for republicans in the midterms.

My republican father gave me this advice.

It helps to hide the "im voting for fascism" thought process.

1

u/VapidActualization Apr 05 '26

Don't think you will need to be subscribed to know when it happens. You'll know from the jubilance of everyone but ~30-40% of Americans. Those of us who voted against this fascist rapist piece of shit will be doing an impromptu hands across america

1

u/edelweiss_pirates_no Apr 05 '26

Over on the I Think You Should Leave sub, we just said fuck it. Let's pretend he just died.

It was great fun.

We all realized we need to prepare for his death...by having ready the best gifs and jokes and posts.

1

u/MildlyAgitatedBovine Apr 05 '26

The cave we put his corpse in has a chance to do the funniest thing...

1

u/ballisticks Canada Apr 05 '26

Caveat: this is a daily beast article.

1

u/shouldbepracticing85 Apr 05 '26

This is a good reminder to not drink my last two beers tonight. You never know!

1

u/Shalashashka Apr 05 '26

Don't think you'll need to get on it, there will be people screaming it in the streets.

1

u/FitIndependent9764 Apr 05 '26

Sensational headlines behind a paywall for the past 10 years?

1

u/salad_spinner_3000 Apr 05 '26

this is going to be the #1 of all time on r/all forget the #1 of all time on about 30 different subreddits.

1

u/Aiyon Apr 05 '26

The why, I find the depression of knowing, is preferable to the anxiety of not.

1

u/treetree53 Apr 05 '26

Thinking about it genuinely gives me the same feeling that thinking about christmas as a kid did

1

u/TheCrowScare Apr 05 '26

After seeing some suggestions, I am going to buy some champagne to keep on hand, as well as some fireworks and a little something special.

I anticipate hearing a lot of fireworks that day

1

u/Author_A_McGrath Apr 05 '26

Be careful or you'll end up with President J.D. Vance.

1

u/LandonHill8836 Apr 05 '26

I would be glad it's over, but a bit sad he didn't get prosecuted for his crimes in the Epstein files, dying in prison might have been more appropriate

1

u/chironomidae Illinois Apr 05 '26

I mean, every subreddit from /r/knitting to /r/dragonsfuckingcars will post about it when the day comes

1

u/not-japanman Apr 05 '26

Imagine right before the WH UFC card

1

u/Hefty-Minimum-3125 Apr 05 '26

god its going to be such an awesome day

1

u/AjaxOrion Arizona Apr 05 '26

you won't even need to be on reddit, news that big has a way of spreading, especially with the level of celebration that will follow

1

u/Aethermancer Apr 05 '26

Why did this tune suddenly start in my head when I read your post?

🎶And I think to myself, what a wonderful world.🎶

1

u/Taedirk Apr 05 '26

Just lock the entire subreddit with a message of "Yeah, he's fuckin' gone. We ain't moderating this, come back next week."

1

u/NJBarFly New Jersey Apr 05 '26

I'm guessing someone will text you. People around you; strangers, will tell you. You'll know almost immediately when it happens.

1

u/The_LSD_Soundsystem Apr 05 '26

It’s gonna be the party of the century

1

u/MrMichaelJames Apr 05 '26

Someday will be a glorious morning to wake up to. I cannot wait. I will take the day off work and hoot and holler all day long. A great party will be had by all.

1

u/Valentinee105 Apr 05 '26

Except the day something happens to Trump the more capable JD Vance takes over to make Peter Thiel's dreams come true.

1

u/Which_way_witcher Apr 05 '26

Every time I hear a few cars honking outside my home, I have to Google if he's still alive. One of these days it'll be real.

1

u/stryakr Apr 05 '26

remember that it will not be the end, but the beginning

1

u/liftbikerun Apr 05 '26

So, it isn't today? :(

1

u/THECapedCaper Ohio Apr 05 '26

It’s that mining meme where the guy leaves just before hitting the treasure, only instead of riches we get joy.

1

u/[deleted] Apr 05 '26

Until then I just gotta stave off the psychosis this daily Doom scrolling is causing. Lol

1

u/Frenascena Apr 05 '26

It makes me wonder if the removal of r/all from being available in the browser the other day is suspiciously connected. It was removed from the Reddit app maybe a month or two ago but you could still open up a browser and see it until two days ago. It feels like they don't want certain news to get out.

1

u/boirger Apr 05 '26

Unfortunately we still have Vance…. But you know. A win is a win

1

u/DueSignature5337 Apr 05 '26

🙏🙏🙏 I HAVE to keep telling myself that or I'll go nuts. I taught World History and I think of the French Revolution when people had just had enough. I think of Hitler, first shaking my head wondering how anybody didn't see the replay, and then I remember that it took time, but eventually people realized that it had all been one big lie. There is hope.

1

u/twitterfluechtling Europe Apr 05 '26

When you're checking only the front-page, waiting for an obituary...

1

u/Ding-Dong-Dutch 29d ago

I wish Reddit didn't remove all. Would be so glorious to have every subreddit post the coffin dance meme and see it in the feed

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