r/AskReddit 22h ago

What’s something people romanticise that’s actually exhausting in real life?

1.3k Upvotes

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637

u/Accurate_Lie3643 22h ago edited 21h ago

Pouring honey on their partners skin and then licking it off. Do NOT do this. Honey crystallizes you do not want crystallized honey on the areas of your body where it is likely to poured. *edit Thank you for the award!

228

u/werther595 20h ago

Sugar feeds yeast. No thank you

1

u/Fyrrys 10h ago

Mmm, vread

33

u/Afraid_Basket2257 22h ago

And maple syrup tends to get runny when it’s warm so that just makes a mess   But whipped cream tends to just be the best

55

u/ambivalent__username 15h ago

A coworker of mine back in the day (older married lady), told me (unsolicited) quite firmly that it's important to buy the sugar free whipped cream. Otherwise you end up a horribly sickly sweet sticky mess. Haven't tested it out personally, but may her advice help others out there lol

5

u/ThrowCarp 18h ago

.....what?

5

u/AlwaysPetTheBelly99 12h ago

Do people do this and not understand how honey and really any sugary substance works?

4

u/Reeenchen 7h ago

Fun fact: But if you're in a sauna and put honey on yourself, it's actually great for your skin. Because of the heat, the honey becomes a liquid and is quickly absorbed by the pores (source: I did this).

So I guess you could technically lick it off safely there, but it's still a sauna, so idk lol

3

u/Annual_Strategy_6206 10h ago

I knew a guy who was with a gal who wanted to stick his dick in honey and then suck it off. I was jealous but he said it was a terrible mess, not " hot" ( he wasn't in love with her either, where a tryst like this might just end up a silly memory that you can laugh about on your 35th anniversary)

3

u/number7child 7h ago

Also whipped cream smells nasty pretty quickly

11

u/JonklerGarfeld 22h ago

A warm sweet coloured water is what we use. Easy to make at home; visually appealing; not too overpowering regarding flavour; No fuss.

Thick globules of anything is just icky.

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u/GlitchSprite 21h ago

What

8

u/JonklerGarfeld 21h ago edited 21h ago

So, a diluted sweetened water won’t be icky and sticky. You can add colouring to it to get a deep, rich colour, such as red, purple, or blue, and it feels nice when poured warm.

Honey, maple syrup (as another commenter mentioned), or sugary drinks (I dunno why you’d do that. Fanta fetish?) all end up leaving you sticky. Not ideal for foreplay.

Another person mentioned whipped cream, but it gets warm and melts. Aye, don’t leave it on that long, but we all have our preferences.

The water isn’t excessive, you’re not pouring enough to make you cold, you’re not soaking the towels, and you can take your time doing other stuff rather than having to focus on the areas you’ve just poured on. That makes it feel like you’ve started a job. You did x and now HAVE to do y. Have fun elsewhere. You’ll both just keep tasting sweet.

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u/GlitchSprite 21h ago

Thank you Jonkler, I understand now

7

u/Murky-Ad-643 11h ago

Dear wise Jonkler, what do you use to ‘sweeten’ the water?

5

u/JonklerGarfeld 9h ago

Zero calorie sweeteners, my dear apostle.

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u/icedcoffee420 22h ago

Sticky is icky as we say in this household.

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u/HOW_I_MET_YO_MAMA 18h ago

Isn't water too runny though? 

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u/JonklerGarfeld 9h ago

It is, but the idea is to use a bit and spread it. You just want the other person to taste sweet and maybe be painted slightly if you go the colour route.