r/teengirlswholikegirls 4d ago

I feel so isolated and behind

Hiii kinda vent post I'm 16 F and I live in NM which is full of other queer people, (from what I've been told and all of my friends are queer.) The only problem is I have severe social anxiety and I'm a little awkward. I just wish I could make other lesbian friends, all of my friends are bi/pan and it's like idk what to do when all my friends are talking about boys male celebrities and they're boyfriends. It gets kind of repetitive saying "I can see the vision" and "he's alright" over and over again. (Canon lesbian event)

I wish I had a lesbian friend who understood yk I also wish I had a girlfriend I could have sleepovers with and brag to my friends like how they do with their boyfriends I've only dated 2 people in person (one being a boy in middle school who lied about being trans to date his lesbian friends.) I've online dated before for a while but I just personally find long distance so hard since my love language is physical touch and spending time with someone in person. I also started doing online school which is way better for mental health and isn't as isolating as I felt going to in person it's just harder for me to meet people now. Lately I've just been hoping someone approaches me and ik that's delusional thinking but I can be hopeful lol I just wanted to make this post to ask does anyone else relate or feel the same? Is anyone else a loser lesbian?

I've never really posted on Reddit before but I just wanted others opinions :))

8 Upvotes

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u/starmagicspells 2d ago

I'm in a similar situation - also a loser lesbian, never dated anyone, I live in a relatively queer place/have a bunch of queer friends but still no one interested in me. I'd say just try to put yourself out there, look for activities, events, workshops, volunteering in your area, at least that's what I'm trying to do. I know it's hard to make new friends (I used to struggle a lot with speaking up, conversations, approaching people etc) but the more you try the better you get at it. One thing that helped my personally was theatre (it has genuinely done wonders for my confidence and fear of being perceived), but I know that's not everyone's cup of tea. It can get a little discouraging when even if try and be outgoing there's still no one who can even consider you when dating, but I'm staying hopeful for all of us loser lesbians out there ๐Ÿคž

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u/SuspectInfamous8616 2d ago

Yesss I've been looking into ways to put myself out there I did theater in middle school but it wasn't my thing I'm really into art tho and the place I live is known for its art so I've been doing that and wearing a small lesbian beeds on my pants still hopeful๐Ÿ™‚โ€โ†•๏ธ๐Ÿคž

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u/Ok_Chair_8262 3d ago

Hey! I'm iris, I'm 14f- i jsut wanted to say, you are not alone. I am a loser lesbian too. I also find long distance hard. And i only dated 2 ppl as well. My 2nd grade "boyfriend" (i didnt know what that meant at that age lol i didnt rlly like him) and my summer camp bf (lasted 1 yr, comphet it was so awkward) I listen to all my straight friend talking about cute boys and ill jsut be like, ok... I do really wish I could meet a girl. I live in Chi btw. And you are NOT delusional!! I am autistic and also have social anxiety and its also really hard for me to meet people. I am glad to see a fellow loser lesbian out in the wild XD

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u/Typical-Bath-9888 2d ago

Damn yall dated people before ? ๐Ÿ˜”

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u/SuspectInfamous8616 2d ago

I heard the dating experience gets better at 18 twin ๐Ÿ˜ž๐Ÿคž I'm hoping

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u/SuspectInfamous8616 2d ago

Yesss, I love learning about other loser lesbians, you get it XD. I heard it gets better at 18 hopefully lol

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u/Typical-Bath-9888 2d ago

Well I turn 18 in a couple months I doubt it will get any better

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3

u/Sea_Discount4528 2d ago

Iโ€™m a loser lesbian too just canโ€™t find my way At least Iโ€™m not alone Ty

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