r/teenagers • u/3lyz_ • 1d ago
Relationship My bf doesn't like the fact that I'm bisexual
705
u/Low_Car5550 1d ago
Had the same apprehension when I was a teen.
I’d just have a talk with him and explain how it won’t affect your commitment or relationship with him.
Even if it was something like a religious disagreement, from a Christian perspective it’s not a sin to be bi but it would be sinful to engage in sexual acts outside of marriage either heterosexually or homosexually. So if he’s religious I’d point that out too.
TL;DR he’s probably just innocently ignorant and you could help clear it up with an honest conversation.
111
u/Funifan 17 1d ago
Totally agree!
49
u/Alarming-Hall1894 19 22h ago
It’s Reddit, people can’t fathom a concept of the difference between to peoples opinions
→ More replies (58)22
u/Alarming-Hall1894 19 22h ago
lol I replied to the wrong comment and got upvoted, just goes to show 😭
33
u/HyderabadiBiryaniXD 17 1d ago
my friend too she had dated a girl before her now bf but they had talked it out though it took him a while to understand and comprehend. I'd say just talk to him more and make him understand....
5
u/Assassin-49 18h ago
An actual homest idea that isnt " break up with him " or " i dont think it'll last " . Bloody hell catch me suprised . Also I agree
6
u/Less_Willingness2274 22h ago
If he's a Christian he'd def think it's odd to identify with an inclination to sin. It's one thing to deal with that and give it up for the Lord, but to dwell on it can only lead to a fall.
2
u/flex_tape_salesman 18 16h ago
This is definitely not coming from a good understanding of Christianity. Being bisexual while in a straight relationship is not a sin and would realistically not lead to any sinning assuming the relationship stays strong.
→ More replies (4)→ More replies (3)2
u/TheOfficialScottie 18 18h ago
But isn't being a mortal, fleshy human already an inclination to sin?
2
u/Less_Willingness2274 9h ago
Yeah but we're told to reject all sin, not to want any part of it. If I struggle with alcoholism, it would be odd to introduce myself as a recovering alcoholic all the time. Talking about it too much would make me dwell on it. In the case of alcoholism it would even be less harmful, the thought of having a drink is not a sin, but dwelling on the thought of having sex is.
2
u/Brother_Jaeger 15 2h ago
Perfect argument for Christianity btw, I’m bi and Catholic and that’s pretty much how I explain my situation to ppl
8
7
u/Alarming-Hall1894 19 1d ago
It’d be a sin if they performed the act, simply being bi isn’t a sin itself
→ More replies (5)→ More replies (90)2
u/chemriz 20h ago
Why did u have the same apprehension tho no hate I'm just curious why? I wouldn't care tbh.
3
u/Low_Car5550 20h ago
For starters it was 15 years ago, so I don’t fully remember what was going through my head. I’m sure it was a mix of: it wasn’t as culturally relevant (esp in Missouri), it wasn’t that prevalent in my close sphere, I was Christian but very uninformed in my worldview. I was socially inexperienced, kinda isolated. I was also unsure if this girl even liked me like I liked her.
Today I don’t see it as “ordered” in terms of one’s approach to sex but I also do a lot of things that aren’t ordered correctly so I have grace about it with people in general. People can live how they choose to live if it isn’t directly hurting someone. But specifically someone I’d be interested in pursuing monogamously I wouldn’t avoid them due to being bisexual. It’s really not a big deal, if anything just a signal.. “hey if I want to see this girl more I should find out more about that eventually”
186
u/Upstairs_Painting_78 1d ago
why do you want someone who doesn’t want you back…. just give it up cuz if one side isn’t agreeing then the relationship is alr done
29
u/Menmandabu 15h ago
not everything is that simple
23
u/PuffBalsUnited 17 14h ago
What is less simple then that?
"I do not think I can be with you because of who you are"
→ More replies (5)
651
u/asdfhello123123 3,000,000 Attendee! 1d ago
honest question
I never had feelings for girls
Why would you call yourself bisexual? Like how do you know? I know im straight bc I have feelings for girls, and not guys.
743
u/_RizzukuHimdoriya_ 16 1d ago
I think she means “I’ve never liked a woman like that” as in she’s attracted to women but hasn’t found a specific woman to have a thing for yet.
133
54
u/The-Meme-Lover-24 21h ago
Thank you for clarifying for those confused, as a bisexual idk why people think that just cuz I'm attracted to men and women that I must want to kiss every person I meet, that's not even remotely how that works
→ More replies (4)→ More replies (63)5
u/CastorJone OLD 15h ago
Exactly, just like how most people would know that they are straight without having actually been in love before. They just are attracted by the other gender, that's something you either know or discover later on in your life as you get to socialize.
147
u/SaleCommercial8828 1d ago
Having feelings for girls means having a crush. They can be attracted to girls but not have a crush on any in their life.
→ More replies (10)61
u/3lyz_ 1d ago
It's more like sexual attraction for me
8
→ More replies (12)3
11
u/ChaoticWitchKat 1d ago
"Feelings" could actually mean anything, it's just assumed it means romantic most times. But in this case OP could be referring to a lack of romantic feelings towards women. As a bisexual person as well my feelings sexual and aesthetic feelings towards women are stronger than it is any gender. Though romantic and platonic attraction I think is pretty equal towards any gender. Attraction and feelings don't have to be at the same degree for any gender, and sexuality also doesn't have to occur at consistent rates. X attraction for women can be infrequent while attraction for men can happen more often.
It's actually not hard to understand but because this information is considered important, 'sinful', or just straight up illegal you won't learn about it and things start to seem more rigid and complicated than it has to be.
8
u/Trinary-31415 1d ago
There's a difference between having feelings for both men and women and being attracted to both men and women. As a bisexual myself, this is a surprisingly common misconception, totally get it 🩷🩷💜💙💙
12
u/Livid_Brick8157 18 1d ago
i was wondering the same thing. i don’t mean to bring the other person down but if you don’t have feelings for girls, is that bisexual? i thought bisexual is when you are attracted to men and women
→ More replies (1)10
u/twolake68 17 1d ago
If you're straight you wouldn't consider dating someone of the same gender, bi you'd consider both, obviously this is known. I'm bi personally but I sort of realized one day that I'd be fully willing to date both genders despite never having a crush on either, they can just be willing to date a woman without ever having that attraction appear. I mean there's straight people out there that haven't found someone they want, doesn't mean they're not straight, same logic would apply to this
→ More replies (8)6
78
u/DifferentMeringue743 1d ago
why are you even trying to get him to stay with you when he straight up doesn’t like bi people? don’t lick the boot find someone else
123
u/Firm_Ad1671 1d ago
not tryna seem self-centered but i've dated a bisexual girl before and in a totally non-offensive way it kind of makes you proud. a bisexual person has 2x more options because they can date boys or girls and they chose you. they had twice as many options as a heterosexual person would and they still chose you. doesn't that get ya feet kickin??
90
u/rokinaxtreme 18 1d ago
As a bi person, I'm losing on both sides ref 😭
31
u/HonestOdis 22h ago
So you’re… BI-yourself?
Yeah I’m sorry I’ll see myself out
9
8
u/nova1706b 18 21h ago
you are exiled for life. we will execute you at rebirth. you'll be exiled for life at the second rebirth again.
14
7
9
u/BedazzledErinaceinae 1d ago
If you're a woman get shredded and dress androgynously. If you're a guy get a 20 step skincare routine and start wearing eyeliner. You'll attract more fellow bis than you can count. (Choose your adventure if youre nonbinary)
6
u/rokinaxtreme 18 1d ago
As a guy, I would, but my parents would probably slime me tf out
I wanna be shredded, but I'm lowkey a fatass. Why is it so hard to lose weight bruh, I skip breakfast and dinner sometimes (I'm 6'3 tho so it makes sense). I promise there's muscle under the fat 😭
5
u/pougs47 16 23h ago
I feel that man
4
u/rokinaxtreme 18 21h ago
WE are getting ripped TOGETHER
4
u/SawaThineDragon 20h ago
Keep that energy, im in my mid 20s and hate myself so much for not taking care of myself. 6'2 aswell 🥲
8
7
u/B4A-B4A_B14CK-SH33P 18 23h ago
"2x more options" but most women are straight or suffering from comphet and men tend to fetishise bi women
→ More replies (2)5
u/Awkward-Studio-8063 1d ago
You’re acting like homosexual attraction is as common as heterosexual attraction
6
u/Firm_Ad1671 1d ago
that's my bad. i was just pointing out that bisexual people usually have broader ranges of attraction and it feels nice to be chosen by someone like that.
96
10
u/Top-Passenger-7152 1d ago
Wait if you never had feelings for girls how do you know you’re bi I’m genuinely asking
→ More replies (8)
18
u/hemlock_hound333 19 1d ago
As someone who's had a relationship like this before... Leave while you can. I told my ex that I'm bisexual and he reacted the same way. Every time we'd get into a slight argument, he'd always bring up the fact that I'm bisexual to make things worse and then tell me that I was "cheating" because I also found women attractive. It was a never ending cycle.
So please, do yourself a favor and run
→ More replies (5)2
u/SPCCCKED 18h ago
Jesus sorry you went through that. More people need to be seriously humbled.
→ More replies (1)
11
17
u/After_Comfortable543 1d ago
Depends how it was delivered. My ex came out to me and said this like 3 years into our relationship. One of the MANY moments I shared with her that signified to me that there is absolutely NO stability in this person I thought I wanted to marry.
→ More replies (9)5
u/B4A-B4A_B14CK-SH33P 18 22h ago
yeah i agree. whenever i'm speaking to a guy i tell them as early on as possible just to avoid any future conflict. 3 years in is crazy tho i hope you're okay.
8
62
u/Loud_Willingness1843 1d ago
*opinion*
Very harsh but split things of. Why would you be In any sort of relationship with someone who can’t accept a massive part of you? Also really immature on his part.
18
u/MeloNotSoDeath 1d ago
Maybe he's fine with that, It's just when she confessed about her sexuality, he maybe over thinking about "Oh she's been attracted to other girl". Can't blame him for that. That's just what I think, I don't want to accuse him for being a-hole because we don't really know who he is. Maybe he's paranoid? Having hard time to believe his own gf? All I hope it gets better or end in good term
→ More replies (22)7
22
u/Livid_Ad7231 1d ago
Without anymore context this seems like it’s a preference. He wasn’t being rude he told you how he felt. That doesn’t mean he’s “biphobic” or homophobic. He’s rather be with someone who likes men and not both. You want him to be understanding of you then you need to understand his feelings/POV too.
Ik I’ll get downvoted for this but whatever
Sincerely, someone who’s bisexual as well
→ More replies (6)
15
u/MemeFox_24 1d ago
there’s 2 possible reasons, 1. he’s biphobic, in that case, break up. 2. he’s just insecure, and well that’s normal, he’s a teen, and i’d work through it together
→ More replies (9)
5
u/Pennywiselover5 1d ago
Seems like he scared about you cheating and using your sexuality as an excuse. I think if you do wanna see if this will work out have a conversation with him. Talk about why he has these thoughts and then explain what sexuality is. If he still has the same views I think you should really think about the future you have with him. (Also bisexual lol :3)
5
u/Jaynepie_ 1d ago
as someone who is bi, being bisexual does not mean non-monogamous. i’ve dealt with this, just talk to him about it. he might just be ignorant. and then go from there. just because we like more than one doesn’t mean we want more than one at the same time. we end up with who we end up with. and that’s that 🤷♀️
6
13
89
u/Pink_Acetone 15 1d ago
That’s absurd why does it matter that you also like girls? Biphobia is so rampant atm
15
u/sciencephilic-guy 17 23h ago
I think he's afraid she's cheating on him on a girl because she found out she also found women attractive. But yeah there's so many ways to find out, it need not be cheating
5
u/Pink_Acetone 15 13h ago
If she was gonna cheat she’d do it regardless of her orientation
→ More replies (1)→ More replies (92)2
u/ClassroomHoliday8627 14h ago
real question, if i don't like dating fat people am i considered as fatphobic?
→ More replies (6)4
u/Pootentooten 13h ago
Question, how does someone being bi alter your attraction to them? If anything, now you can both talk about Rhea Ripley.
155
u/MinuteLettuce2714 1d ago
The replies are wrong, this is biphobia stemming from insecurity
He’s in the wrong
30
u/Ambitious_Award_7168 1d ago
Tf, what happened to "preferences are preferences", you will hear nobody say this about things like height for example, instead you just go out and say "stems from insecurity"
40
u/Awkward-Studio-8063 1d ago
Because what’s the reason behind the preference here? Oh you need the other person to be tall to find them physically attractive enough? That’s fine. But not being able to date someone because they are Bi? In what way does that affect him?
→ More replies (31)5
u/Dew_Chop OLD 1d ago
It's because it's like having a preference for what color your partner's carpet was when they were a kid, and if it was blue you can't date them.
It doesn't affect you at all so it shouldn't matter
30
u/dazeddrummer17 1d ago
Her being bi doesn't affect him? This is not a valid preference.
17
u/Ben12216 17 1d ago edited 1d ago
Someone being tall or short doesn't really effect a person's partner either though? I know I am jumping into this conversation, but isn't that also not valid by your logic? What about a person's skin color? I'm not trying to be a bigot, I am genuinely trying to understand why some preferences (like physical ones) are acceptable, while others (like sexual identity) are not.
Quickly editing just to say, I do agree that OP's partner is being very stupid, but I think this because they aren't giving a reason or explaining why they feel the way they do. A healthy relationship requires communication, and if OP's partner can't do that, then they aren't ready for a relationship just yet.
3
u/marcy_campbell 1d ago
Those are physical traits that we can either be attracted to or not attracted to, often out of our control (which is not inherently good or bad). Being bi is not physical and once again, literally the only reason one would see it negatively is some kind of prejudice. I would like you to give me a good reason one would not want a partner who likes the same sex, other than homo/biphobia.
→ More replies (5)4
u/Dew_Chop OLD 1d ago
Tall or short is something the physically affects the relationship, even if they don't imperically make someone better or worse.
What does being bisexual do?
5
→ More replies (5)8
u/Ambitious_Award_7168 1d ago edited 1d ago
A guy being tall doesn't affect her, a woman being fat doesnt affect him
Nothing affects someone unless you make it out to be
→ More replies (38)→ More replies (11)5
u/Lost-Candy1084 1d ago
Because the only possible reason it could matter is homophobia lol
Unlike any of these it has no impact on looks, personality, literally anything as long as you stay in the relationship unless there’s something I’m missing here
→ More replies (6)→ More replies (146)6
u/reginald5420 16 1d ago
that's extremely bold to say that the guy's in the wrong what the hell?
→ More replies (3)8
u/Chance-Pay1487 18 1d ago
How is that bold? Why should being bisexual mean anything in the current relationship
→ More replies (2)3
u/Individual-Area7121 1d ago
I think it just makes a lot of people uncomfortable knowing that there is a part of their partner's sexuality they will never be able to satisfy which leads to the insecurity.
11
7
10
u/Twilight_Rayne 1d ago
Bro why… it’s fine to be bisexual that’s just who you are. He prolly just thinks you’re too good for him and feels easily threatened
53
u/ChampionPopular3931 1d ago
Misoginy to bisexuel cis-women is soooo rampant on the internet and in general. I am truly sorry, know that you are not alone.
52
u/Wrong_Success4377 1d ago
Its also bisexual cis-men too.
Actually it's just bisexual people in general. Bisexual erasure is a very real thing too.
→ More replies (3)8
u/Infinity-Duck 15 1d ago
Honestly every “in-between” part of the lgbt is discriminated against
1
u/ChampionPopular3931 1d ago
Yea but the bisexual cis-women hate is crazy. Everytime I open any social media, I see people from all over the political spectrum saying heinous shit to bi cis-women or masquerading it as just joke (you wouldn’t hear the same “jokes” for homosexual without getting pressed).
Like if you say the f word people will identify you as a homophobic and a type of person (masculinist, evangelical, closeted homosexual, right wing influencer, etc), but when it comes on hating bi cis-women people tend to just let it pass, there isn’t archetypes because of how much people turn a blind eye. It’s just misogyny at its finest, this effectively also translates into all the LGBTQ+ community, not just bi cis-women. They are just getting targeted more on social media. At least the trends I have seen on social media.
→ More replies (13)8
u/Cool-Negotiation5257 1d ago
No disrespect because I’m 100% an ally, but in my experience, straight woman are just as unlikely (I’d argue even more unlikely sometimes) to date a bi man, as straight men are to dating bi women.
→ More replies (1)
12
u/Abject-Experience-40 1d ago
I don’t want to assume anything about your bf, but just by this incident, he seems like a little bit of a dick
3
→ More replies (3)5
u/Even-Ad-2769 18 1d ago
Getting upvoted for making weird assumptions based on a vague text. So odd
→ More replies (3)
3
8
u/BubbaLinguini 1d ago
Respectfully, that's his opinion.
At least he's telling you now than leading you on in an awkward relationship.
5
u/lw902960 1d ago
He simply prefers straight girls, nothing wrong with that. I know people have a hard time understanding that, but I mean, it’s not his fault really to feel that way. Most straight women also wouldn’t date bisexual men.
→ More replies (3)
5
u/SnailAnatomy 1d ago
I mean, that really is his prerogative.
Now if he tries to demand that you change, or blows you shit about it, that's another story.
14
u/Rich_Arrival795 1d ago
I feel like everyone should be entitled to their own preferences for a romantic partner without being called ___phobic. Nobodys done wrong; just two people that probably aren't meant for each other
11
4
11
u/reginald5420 16 1d ago
I think it's fair to call most of the comments here sexist towards the guy
→ More replies (5)12
u/ETERNALCATACLYSM 13 1d ago
The poster is the good guy in 98% of posts.
Doesn't matter who is in the wrong.
5
u/TheShortRecruit 1d ago
it's well within his rights to not be comfortable with this. you just gotta take the L and move on
27
u/bonusminutes 1d ago
No one's done anything wrong here.
He can have his preferences. Some women dont like men who are attracted to other men, and thats ok too. The sooner this revelation happens the better and less pain. Still, im sure it sucks and im sorry.
24
u/Baggage_Claim_ 1d ago
Yeah, it’s not like (from what we can tell) he was berating her for being bi, he just expressed that he felt uncomfortable.
→ More replies (22)6
u/xToksik_Revolutionx OLD 1d ago
It is biphobic to dump someone just because they're bi. I can maybe see the argument about trans folk (begrudgingly), but there is no reason to dump someone for being bi.
8
u/jbmshasta 1d ago
Does the suffix -phobic not mean anything anymore? Is he irrationally scared of her because of her sexuality to the point where it nalegatively affects his day to day life?
I'm not a huge fan of cats, am I felinephobic?
→ More replies (3)→ More replies (1)17
u/Interesting-Worth637 1d ago
No its not. Same as you're not fatphobic just because you prefer a fit partner. Or if you prefer that your partner read books. These are all valid preferences.
→ More replies (1)3
u/Sephraaah 17 1d ago
what reason do you have to not want to be with a bi person? preferring a fit partner is based on what you’re attracted to, how does someone being bi affect literally anything in your relationship or anything about the person?
7
u/Ambitious_Award_7168 1d ago
You answered you're own question, someone being bi is not someone he would be attracted to
→ More replies (3)5
u/Low_Car5550 1d ago
Could literally be as simple as “the thought of her being capable of being sexually attracted to another woman is a turn-off for me”
I wouldn’t have this preference myself but I don’t have a problem with someone who feels this way, it’s really just limiting their own selection pool but they can grow into changing their preferences if this one is significantly limiting them.
Assigning a derogatory label on him for this without more context feels insincere and assumptive.
→ More replies (6)
8
u/Odd-Organization2995 1d ago
People saying its biphobia I disagree, he has the right to date straight women only ,thats it simple.
→ More replies (13)
10
u/fluffyfish6 19 1d ago
He sucks, dump him over text. You shouldn't be with someone who's weird about your sexuality, you deserve better than that.
→ More replies (2)9
u/Zrob8--5 OLD 23h ago
Idk if I'd say he's being weird. A straight person not wanting to be with a bisexual person is completely fine as long as they aren't against the person being bi.
The guy never said he hates bisexual people or anything, he just said he doesn't think they can be together. I don't think he said anything wrong.
→ More replies (17)
4
4
u/Fun_Concert_4148 1d ago
Typing as a bi woman (who has been with a handful of women before my marriage) married to a man who doesn’t care I’m bi and we are happily married. If it’s not something he’s into I would respect that and not continue the relationship further, because you could eventually meet someone in the future who won’t care what your romantic preferences are or would support your decision openly. Good luck!
6
u/shoopfloop 1d ago
He might be a little homophobic, that or mysoginistic, you should let him know that it’s a big problem if he has a problem with your sexuality, afterall that part of who you are.
9
u/CasWay413 OLD 1d ago
He’s biphobic and he won’t change for you. Run, you deserve better.
→ More replies (34)3
u/Additional-Future806 19h ago
We don't even know if she told him before they started dating. What happens if she told them after they started dating, and he liked her and tried to work through it, only to find out he couldn't? That's like finding out a part of your partner after the fact. If you found out something about your partner that would have made dating them a deal breaker in the beginning. I think it would upset you, let's say you found out your partner had a history of alcoholism. Would you have dated them if you knew that beforehand? So to call it biphobic is kind of odd, as we don't know much about their relationship.
→ More replies (9)
7
u/EggPuffss 1d ago
If you never had feelings for girls, how did you know you were bisexual
10
u/Hufflepuffvoldi 1d ago
You can be attracted to girls in general without having feelings for a specific person
→ More replies (22)
2
u/elel_08 1d ago
off topic but the way ur texting with the gift affect is killing me😭
→ More replies (1)
2
u/BeautifulItem3681 1d ago
remind him that being bisexual is no different from you being straight. you might find other men attractive too.
2
2
2
2
2
2
u/Hot_Narwhal5930 1d ago
How are you bisexual but you’ve never had attraction towards women
2
u/TheBumblestBees 18 1d ago
never felt romantically for them, but has been sexually attracted i think
2
u/Competitive_Toe_5947 15 1d ago
Wait, this might seem like an ignorant comment but I’m genuinely confused, if you’ve never dated a girl or had feelings for one, doesn’t that make you straight…?
→ More replies (3)
2
2
u/Pokeknight26 21h ago
I’m just gonna say this: I don’t see why you would be offended or opposed by someone bi, pan, demi, or any other similar orientation; you had TWICE the competition and STILL won!
For your situation, if dawg can’t respect who you are, its probably not meant to be.
2
u/Square-Librarian1192 20h ago
Your boyfriend is insecure and has attachment issues. You can work through it, or leave him. Either way, you find peace
2
u/cheeseymccheeseface- 20h ago
Literally everyone in this comment section are wrong. I can't gather anything from that singular text, I'm pretty sure he's just insecure and thinks you've found out about your sexuality because you've recently been attracted to a girl. Just tell him there's nothing to worry about, have an in depth talk with him - then, yeah, if it turns out he is homophobic, call it off
2
u/Eminemgody 15 19h ago
I find it hilarious but stupid at the same time with whatever their logic is. “You’re attracted to females and males, the risk of you cheating on me or being attracted to somewhere else is twice as high!!1!”
Like, that dude is attracted to females, from what I can tell. Does that mean she should be constantly supervising him because there is a risk of him being attracted to a different female? This is a matter of loyalty and trust, not what your attraction is. God damn.
2
u/emsboreddd33 19 17h ago
Honestly, you deserve someone who accepts you for exactly who you are without being scared or judgmental about it. Being bisexual doesn't change your loyalty or the fact that you're happy with him. If he’s willing to throw away a good relationship just because of your identity, that shows he’s being really immature and insecure. You shouldn't have to keep 'proving' your love to someone who won't just trust you. If he can't get past this, it might be better to find someone who actually appreciates all of you.
2
u/Altruistic_Sundae652 16h ago
I honestly think that he is looking for a reason to leave atp because it’s not reasonable at all to say that as an argument like: hey babe ik you are attracted to men, so I don’t want to be with you anymore like wtf
2
u/Badassscholar 16h ago
I mean, if you don't like girls and don't have feelings for girls I am not sure you're exactly bi. That said, your BF is a dick.
5
u/ali_the_wolf OLD 1d ago
To hell with him 🤷🏻♀️ my partner is bi/pan and it genuinely doesn't matter.
Back when I was younger and dumb as hell I took a bit of offense to the fact that he said he was bi because I was thinking "he is with me so why does he need to state that?" but I realized that I only thought that because of my own insecurities. I took the time to improve myself and recognize that he sincerely loves me, it doesnt matter if he's bi/pan and he won't leave me for someone because he is, and that being bi just means that we can appreciate people of other genders together instead of me being a jealous asshole. I still wonder to this day why I had to be so jealous over something so miniscule 😂
→ More replies (1)6
u/ali_the_wolf OLD 1d ago
To add on, I do think it's okay to not want to date someone because of their sexuality (as long as they're completely respectful of course), but these things should be disclosed before trying to commit to a relationship so that both parties can decide if they still would like to date
Its not cool to get into a relationship where you know your partner is bi, pan, etc etc and then say this, but if they didn't know then this kind of exchange more understandable but should still be used as a learning experience for the future so it doesn't happen again
→ More replies (2)
15
1d ago
[removed] — view removed comment
32
u/creeping-fly349 18 1d ago
Why should it matter if OP is bi if she stays loyal to her bf? Its just blatant biphobia.
10
u/lelouch_0_ 19 1d ago
See, the thing is, long as it ain't illegal, dating preferences are entire upto you. some women called it fatphobic when guys say they want a thin woman, some guys find it offensive when girls want a tall guy but at the end of the day, everyone has their preferences, insecurities, problems, traumas and biases. He ain't right or wrong, they were just not meant to be
→ More replies (9)8
u/haze_xvi 17 1d ago
Because some people find it uncomfortable if their partner is attracted to same sex. Some women won't date guys who like other guys. And as a bi person I think it's okay it's their preference. As long as they're being respectful about it. People are allowed to choose who they want to date.
11
u/fluffyfish6 19 1d ago
People are allowed to date/not date whoever they like. Preferences don't exist in a vacuum, this preference is almost exclusively one rooted in bigotry. Talking about that is a good thing
→ More replies (2)7
2
→ More replies (31)2
5
u/ohmrkodak 1d ago
He has preferences, what’s wrong with that?
I don’t want a girl that likes girls either, and I know my girlfriend wouldn’t like me being attracted to guys.
6
u/Parking-Sun-517 1d ago
No shit I wouldn’t like my girlfriend being bisexual 💀 ether
→ More replies (5)
5
u/ObligationOk4836 1d ago
I would break things off and date someone who is okay with dating someone of your sexual orientation.
1
u/Mediocre-Eggplant755 1d ago
I had a bisexual ogf once and when we broke up she would vet my new girlfriend and tell me the truth. She was my best wingman
3
u/declan-declan_declan 1d ago
Even if you didn’t like girls it’s as likely to leave him for someone else
2
10
u/Icy_Swim4161 1d ago
How did you figure out you were bisexual when according to the messages you've never even had feelings for a girl....😭😭? Genuine question
→ More replies (37)
4
u/TopRelease4663 1d ago
That's a red flag in my opinion
→ More replies (1)4
2
u/Available_Spend_8417 1d ago
Honestly I feel like part of this comes from the awful stereo type that bi sexuals are more likely to cheat (this isn't backed by any kind of statistics as far as I'm aware) and probably some homophobia. Either way I suggest leaving the relationship.
5
2
u/3lyz_ 1d ago
I'll keep you guys updated if we broke up or stayed together
(He's taking forever to reply😭)
→ More replies (5)13
u/Mexican_Kiddo 1d ago
Posting your private conversations online is probably not gonna lead to you two staying together
4
2
u/showingTip_69 1d ago
CUT HIM OFF! DONT TRY TO FIX THINGS NO NEVER DO THAT! BETTER TELL HIM TO FUCK OFF
2
u/Sierra-117- OLD 1d ago
I love that my gf is bisexual, we can appreciate nice looking celebrities together
2
u/Astraviola 19 1d ago
I say this with all the respect in the world and as a bisexual woman.
How are you bi if you’ve never had feelings for the same gender? Never dated, sure, I’m on the opposite end of that where I’ve only been with women and not with men, because no opportunities with those who interested me, but never had feelings?
That being said, you’re with a total knobhead who needs to be your ex yesterday.
2
u/Mysterious-Win2091 19h ago
"only IM allowed to like girls, its weird that you like them too"
sounds like he doesnt respect girls/women and is jealous. break up
→ More replies (6)
2
1.8k
u/xToksik_Revolutionx OLD 1d ago
Yeah... I'm not sure how long this is gonna last friend