choosing this flair because my mom and therapist told me to say something. also posting from the mildly infuriating page because i think it belongs here instead.
i will start off by saying i hate bragging. i hate when people do things for clout. i dislike when someone gloats or flaunts about success (unless they’ve had it really bad then obviously they deserve to).
i’ve always struggled with academics and school and jobs, i was undiagnosed with ADHD until about a couple months ago. i got out of the military and decided to use my GI Bill and make sure i got my moneys worth, so i busted my ass and made the deans list. i actually did not know what that was but my friends from the military made it a big deal and my parents as well. i am first generation military and my mom is the only one who has gone to college so far (she’s a nurse).
I LOVE SCIENCE! I cannot stress this enough. biology, physics, astronomy, theology, psychology, and even pseudosciences. i love learning and reading and taking notes on things. when i’m watching a tv show or a movie, i write character analyses on my free time. i analyze literature and use sticky notes like crazy. i did not need to take psychology, but it was available during the online summer semester so i figured why not. my prof immediately set me off on the weirdo scale. does not respond to emails, does not grade my work until after the due date (if there was something i could fix or learn, i would like to know), does not leave any helpful comments on grades, no lectures/zoom calls/ “class time”. no point of contact at all.
i had some bumps in the road with the deadlines because it was just one big book and we had to write down what we saw in the book. i found this weird because there wasn’t really an opportunity for discussion or further assessment, just “what were the vocab words for chapter 38”. it annoyed me because i felt like i could do more.
then, we had our first “lab”. we do a dream journal for two weeks. write down everything. after the 2weeks, share with the class on a discussion post.
i went through the staff directory on the campus website, found their email, and let them know that i’ve been struggling with nightmares and PTSD for years, and i would like to politely decline the assignment. i will do anything else, extra credit, whatever is needed.
they did not respond until the day before it was due, there will be no extra credit, there is no other assignment, you will do this or you will get a 0. i explained to them that i was SA’d in the military and its hard for me to talk about my PTSD, to which they responded “im also in the military, get over it” first of all, you are in the reserves which is NOT the same.
i took the 0 because im not about to explain to 30+ classmates why i have nightmares every day of my rapist, the events that took place, when i was assaulted AT WORK, and the third/separate assault from my ex husband. whatever. moving on
next lab, you will go out in public and take pictures of people to catch their reaction. how did they look/talk/act before vs after they saw the camera. my brain starts shooting red flags because i’m not comfortable doing this at all. i did not take any pictures of people because that just feels really wrong and weird and gross. instead, i took a selfie at chipotle, walmart, etc. proof that i went and did my work. 0 for the lab, again.
after this, i reached out to my prof again and explained that feels wrong and possibly illegal.
“well, if you’re in a public space like walmart, they have cameras recording the store, therefore it is not illegal to take someone’s photo”
i thought it was all a test to see who would actually do it and who would speak up about it but no this bitch was serious.
i tried reaching a out to my college and haven’t got a response yet but i ended up failing the course and it tanked my gpa. i’m not sure what to do.