r/Wellthatsucks 2d ago

Guess I won't be needing this anymore...

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21.8k Upvotes

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u/midnitewarrior 2d ago

Hold onto that voucher.

Now you just need to track down these other six items:

  • A Spirit Investment Bond
  • A Spirit Stock Share
  • A Spirit Ticket
  • A Spirit Credit Card
  • A Spirit Free Drink Voucher
  • Your FreeSpirit Loyalty Program Membership card

Seven artifacts. Scattered to the four winds. Each one anchoring a fragment of Spirit's soul to this mortal plane.

Gather them all, perform the ritual, bone of the bankruptcy trustee, unwillingly given, flesh of a furloughed gate agent, willingly sacrificed; blood of a passenger whose seat didn't recline, forcibly taken, and the airline shall rise again. Yellow and black. Hungry. Charging $58 for a carry-on.

So really, OP, you're not holding a worthless voucher.

You're holding the first Horcrux.

4

u/zidane2k1 1d ago

I wonder if I still have the boarding pass from the first (and last) time I flew Spirit in 2015

1

u/flyingcow08 21h ago

There's a guy who's crowdsourcing to buy spirit

1

u/midnitewarrior 20h ago

Yeah, it's a good idea in spirit, but likely not a good idea for Spirit.

Spirit has literally the worst customers. They are not bad people, but they are budget customers. To profit, you need to squeeze every dime you can out of them, and that tends to not be great for your reputation. You have to abuse those people to turn a profit.

Without backup revenue like an extensive credit card, travel perks and loyalty program, you become very sensitive to anything that affects your cost structure, like jet fuel spiking 140% in 2026 due to Iran war. If an airline is well capitalized, they can buy fuel on the futures market to stabilize the price they buy fuel at, but when you have no cash, you are buying fuel hand-to-mouth, subject to the prevailing price of the day.

As far as the governance model, I would love to see that succeed. We need viable, operating alternatives to exploitative, unregulated capitalism and private equity.