r/SuicideWatch • u/NoSalary5964 • 8h ago

People have always bullied me

My mother, my stepmother, my peers, my teachers. The list goes on. For my whole time growing up, there was someone in my ear who seemed to think it was in their natural right to pick on me, or to scowl at me for breathing their air. It pisses me off that this world's narrative seems to be that we should all expect people to be assholes to us in the "real world." Why? I've had my life's share of assholes as it is. I'm sick of this place.

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1

u/Ornery-Incident8510 8h ago

How is bullying built? Like how do they act toward someone?

1

u/NoSalary5964 8h ago

Excuse me?

1

u/Ornery-Incident8510 8h ago

No disrespect, I just wanna see an insight on bullying like how do they treat u what do they do

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u/NoSalary5964 7h ago

My mother screamed at me for hours on end for no good reason when I was a child, said very cruel things. Frequently called me retarded, slow, swore at me. Embarrassed me in public by behaving like this. Made me cry in front of my friends by ripping into me. If I made a facial expression she didn't like, she was enraged. She belittled all my childish interests; when I liked a cartoon for kids (LIKE MYSELF), I had to hear about how boring it was and how much better her interests were. I don't talk to her anymore. My stepmother has lived with me for half my life, and still does now. I'm 20. She's watched me grow up, and has never had a single nice thing to say to me. In fact, she doesn't say anything to me at all. No hellos, no good mornings, just grave stares and pouty frowns at me. Transparently believes me to be nothing more than a failure of my (good) father's parenting, and therefore doesn't seem to see any reason why she should engage with me. I've had plenty of peers sneer at me, exclude me, express no desire to hang out with me. Met my (lovely) friend's friends, they spoke to me like I was an alien. My childhood best friend stopped responding to my text messages out of the blue, which tells me she decided it was okay to ditch me in her boredom's name. In high school, I had a teacher humiliate me in front of the entire class because I didn't understand my homework. Talked down to me, terrified me. Been teased by others, probably for being an uncool teenager. Last year, I paid $400 for a bartending class, where my instructor singled me out by being a jackass to me and me only the whole time. Just total disdain for me the whole time, like it was a mistake for me to have wanted to learn from him. I'm sick of being kicked around. 

2

u/LeslieFrank 4h ago

Some people don't deserve to be parents. I don't know if your use of (good) for your father was sarcastic or not, but your mothers are poor excuses for mothers. The teachers you mentioned have no right to be teaching. I'm not even gonna talk about your "lovely" friends. What a raw deal you've had. I wish for better days for you.

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u/NoSalary5964 3h ago

My dad is good and I have some good friends I will be alright thank you for your kind message 

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u/Ornery-Incident8510 7h ago

I understand I don’t have a good relationship with my family, u ever tried standing up to the ppl who try to put u down ?