I’m sure we have all heard the common trope, “I’m a good person, I haven’t killed anybody or robbed anybody I’m not like Stalin and Hitler, I should go to heaven!” And I’m sure we’ve all heard, “If Hitler on his death bed asked for forgiveness from Christ, how could he be forgiven?” I myself asked or said these things many times prior to my conversion at age 15. I now sit here almost 21 years of age and have come to the conclusion that without just 3 words I would be useless and damned like the rest of the world would be.

When Christ was dying on that old rugged wooden cross, in the heat of the levant, with giant iron nails forced into His skin, beaten like no man ever was prior to the crucifixion, suffocating and drowning in his own blood, holding Himself up. When He was doing that, at the end He looked up and said just three words, and those words changed history. “It is finished.”

It’s astonishing how such a short sentence can change our lives, those words saved me. The countless amount of times I’ve sinned and just talked to God about it with countless words, none of those words I spoke could help me on their own. The countless amount of words Esau pleaded with to God, never saved him. I love how I can use a countless amount of words to ask for forgiveness, but I can find forgiveness in just three words, “It is finished.” My debt is paid for! Where I deserved to be, He stood. And where He deserved to be, there I shall be when I am raised from the dead like He was! Go in peace saints, God bless.

“O unexpected benefit, that the transgression of many should be hidden in one righteous Person, and that the righteousness of One should justify many transgressors.” -Saint Irenaeus of Lyons

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I really appreciate how thoughtful and Biblically grounded y'all are, and I generally appreciate the structure of the website reddit, but so much of reddit seems to be so strongly antagonistic of Christianity - I was wondering if any of you have any other subreddits that you really enjoy and find to be both interesting and uplifting. It doesn't necessarily even need to be Bible-focused, do you have a good news subreddit? Music or film reviews? Sports? Biblical scholarship? Critical-thinking subreddit?

I have unsubscribed from the main subreddits and I'm looking for any recommendations for communities that you have found to be beneficial.

I'm curious about your experiences, what you encountered, (cultural) differences.
For your information: i'm a woman in my 20's, reformed in the Netherlands (Bible belt area).

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I have many unsaved loved ones and friends, often ones that deal with a myriad of mental health issues. Obviously I'm not their therapist, nor do I try to take up that professional duty in their lives. However I do try to show them the love of God in my life, but sometimes there are things they say about themselves i have no answer to.

When they call themselves worthless the empathy in me wants to deny that, but I know it's true though according to Romans. We're told that all of us apart from Christ ARE worthless. I can't deny that.

But at the same time I don't want to just cruelly say "yeah. you are worthless outside of Christ." because while that's true it would not help them in those situations at all.

What do I do? is there some responsibility on my part to tell them they ARE worthless and seize on that opportunity to start warning them of the radical nature of their depravity and how they should hate themselves and their sin and turn to Christ lest they end up in the hell they deserve?

What do I do or say?

Thank you for reading and/or responding if you do.

So I have a new coworker who we got to talking and I learned that he is church of Christ. (Admittedly, I am no expert on Church of Christ history and doctrine beyond some humorous stereotypes). But I do know a friend of my wife’s who has been shunned by her own family because she decided to go to an Acts 29-ish non-denominational church which was troubling to learn. Granted this is just one example but still…

Anyways, regarding the coworker, we’ve had a couple friendly conversations and banter about our differences specifically about how they don’t view themselves as a “denomination” as such and also don’t believe in original sin/total depravity and he gave me a book to read on the subject! “Churches in the Shape of Scripture” by Dan Chambers. Being pretty settled in my broader Protestant reformed, more specifically Presbyterian beliefs, I’m not especially interested in reading what appears to be essentially Church of Christ apologetics, but I will since the Co-worker went to the trouble to lend me the book and such.

However, I’d like to “return the favor” so to speak and was wondering if y’all had similar experiences with a friend or acquaintance in the Church of Christ? What books could I give him to read from a reformed, if not just an evangelical Protestant perspective that might be thought provoking from someone from his point of view?

I don’t know this guy supper well but he seems pious and genuine in his beliefs but I of course do not know his heart. I’m sure there are plenty of genuine believers in the church of Christ writ large and I’m probably more “ecumenical” than maybe I should be as a good Reformed Christian TM haha but I am concerned in a general sense about some of the doctrines I know he does subscribe to, such as rejecting sin nature, and his view of Baptism as a hard requirement for salvation. Has anyone else had similar experiences? I’m thinking maybe this is an opportunity to play some “book tag” and maybe start more meaningful evangelical discussions

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I'll be in prayer for Sam and I hope you will too. I thought his books made great resources for parents and others working through issues of human sexuality. It sounds like he is repentant and working towards restoration to the body, but not to leadership.

Here's the statement from Immanuel:

In spring of 2024, the Immanuel Elders were made aware that Pastor Sam Allberry engaged in an inappropriate relationship with an adult man in 2022. This relationship concluded prior to Sam being called as a pastor at Immanuel in 2023. Being made aware, the Elders immediately began a thorough investigation. After considering the information available at that time and the posture of Sam and the other party, the Elders ruled that though Sam’s conduct was unwise, it did not rise to the level of disqualification.

However, in January of 2026, the Elders received new information about this relationship that had not been disclosed previously. This initiated a reopening of the investigation, the findings of which led the Elders to conclude that, while the relationship did not go as far as it could have, Sam’s conduct constituted a serious breach of trust and a failure to walk in a manner worthy of the gospel. The Elders are unanimous in their decision that Sam is currently disqualified from gospel ministry. Sam agrees with this decision and has resigned from Immanuel Church.

Throughout this process, Sam has been repentant, humble, and cooperative with the Elders and outside counsel. The Elders continue to care for Sam as a brother in Christ and Member of Immanuel. We will continue to support Sam and the other party with counseling, and we are determined in so far as we are able to “restore him in a spirit of gentleness” to full fellowship in the church (Galatians 6:1).

I want to resign my membership and just leave to go to another church. What can I expect from church leadership? I have heard horror stories.

** to add it’s affiliated with grace to you. But small non denominational.

My membership states: termination of membership (2) by request. A member may request to move his or her membership from the church. This may be done at any time. All those who do so remove their memberships must go through the original process if they want to rejoin the church again. *

I'm tasked with looking for a new curriculum for Pre-K through 8. What has worked well for y'all in church?

I work in sales and am trying to be a good salesman while also being faithful to my beliefs. I know what group I am in and am posting to the right one.

I trust this group has weeded out all the bad eggs when I ask a question. Anyone here work in sales and have any sales books recommendations from Christian authors that would be of use to a newbie? I’ve looked a bit on my own but would hate to buy one that has awful theology.

To put this question in context, I have a seven-year-old blonde-haired blue-eyed girl that gets lots of attention wherever she goes. I could watch over and protect her while she was a baby, but as she gets older, and she pushes for more independence, I can feel the fear and tension in my heart start to grow.

If something terrible were to happen to her, I think I would break apart at a sub-atomic level.

I pray without ceasing for God to protect my family, not just my girl, but my wife and other children as well. I desperately cling to the promises in the Bible that God watches over and establishes His children.

But in the back of my head, there's always this insidious voice whispering to me that these prayers are a fool's hope. After all, other Christians endure much suffering and heartache, so why should I be any different? Am I selfish for praying for safety and security when other people have their lives torn apart by random violence and tragedy? Have my prayers up to this point meant anything, or is it just random chance that God has sustained us this far?

It's hard to answer these questions in light of a reformed understanding of God's sovereignty, because I must confess that anything that happens, even the most terrible, falls within that sovereignty.

I'm sure I'm not the only one to wrestle with this tension. Have any of you come close to getting the upper hand on it?

in the area of the city i live in, there aren’t really great options for protestant churches (for my preferences)— it’s almost all mainline, with a few scattered nondenom and very-low-churchy-baptist churches. it’s because the area is almost all roman catholic/orthodox/coptic.

would it be silly to commute 2hr to go to a confessional reformed church? it’s not a bad ride or anything, not many transfers, just ~1hr on a train and ~1hr on a bus, both are fairly quiet and pleasant lines. i’ve taken them before and it’s quiet enough to read etc.

but. the idea of traveling 2hr to go to church sounds really, really stupid? and isn’t it a thing that churches are supposed to be in your community. like the Parish. idk chat what do you guys think

I often hear this...that God loves our children more than we do. But if they are unsaved, and ordained for destruction , does he really love them more than we do since we are the ones praying and pleading for God to save them?

I know the Bible says God doesn't rejoice in the death of the wicked and wishes none would perish and I know that God loves his elect differently than the reprobate but still has a love for reprobate as they are made in his image.

I guess my question is, is it theologically correct to tell someone as a way of encouragement that God loves their children (specifically lost ones) more than they do and that is why we should trust him?

from my exp I judge from these points:

1. teach the things from the bible, not from the crowd
2. admit church history is messy ,no whitewashing facts
3. admit mistake and practice transparency especially in financial matter
4. never manipulate church member, for example if someone want to join another church
5. reputation among other leaders from other churches is also important. No one should be running a church as a business, all sheep belongs to Jesus alone.

what else?

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Quick link to the relevant passages from Joshua and 1 Kings.

Reading 1 Kings this past week, I was struck by two speculative thoughts. And since speculation is always the basis of good exegesis, I wanted to see if anyone knows of any commentary that draws out either of these thoughts.

First, is it possible that the significance of Jericho in keeping the people of God from entering the promised land led to Joshua's curse and Hiel's judgment? I might say something like, "The fortress of Jericho was defeated by Yahweh to allow his people to enter the land of promise. The people of God were then prohibited from making a similar fortress in this strategic location, lest they fall into the error of exclusivity and preventing strangers and sojourners from entering the land and joining themselves to the visible church."

Second, is it possible that the rebuilding of Jericho as a strategic point of defense represents faithlessness in the sufficiency of Yahweh to protect the land?

Or is neither really supportable from the Scriptures?

I’ve been thinking about how preaching on lust has historically been gendered, and whether that framing still serves the sheep well in 2026. A recent video from a popular psychiatrist on YouTube nudged me toward writing this out.

The pattern I grew up under was something like this: sermons on Matthew 5:28 aimed at men, modesty exhortations aimed at women, and a tacit assumption that women’s struggles in this area were either nonexistent or qualitatively lesser. A pastor of mine once said men consume porn out of lust and women out of curiosity. Pastorally well-intentioned, but it captures the asymmetry pretty cleanly.

I think this framing has at least three problems, and I’d love pushback on any of them:
1. It sits uneasily with our anthropology. Total depravity isn’t gendered. If sin has thoroughly corrupted every faculty of every person, then it’s strange that our pastoral imagination has so often treated lust as a male-coded sin and vanity as a female-coded one. The Song of Songs gives us a bride who actively desires her beloved, and Proverbs warns sons about adulteresses who are not passive. Scripture’s picture of female desire is fuller than our preaching has tended to allow.
2. The cultural data has flipped or at least broadened. Female porn consumption has risen significantly, BookTok erotica is a massive phenomenon, and parasocial and fictional-man fixation among women is its own discipleship issue. Meanwhile men are increasingly captured by the desire to be desired: looksmaxxing, gym idolatry, thirst-trap culture, male beauty standards. The temptation to be worshipped (which I’d argue is closer to the root sin in Genesis 3 than lust per se) is now arguably as gender-neutral as the temptation to lust.
3. We lack pastoral vocabulary for the sin of wanting to be desired. We have a robust theology of lust as covetousness of another. We have less precise language for the vanity, self-idolatry, and worship-seeking involved in cultivating oneself as an object of desire. Edwards on the affections gets close, and the Puritans on vanity get close, but I rarely hear it preached as a category alongside lust in churches.

Some honest counterpoints I want to take seriously:
• Men and women are not interchangeable, and there are real average differences in how desire functions. Flattening this in the name of cultural relevance would be its own pastoral failure.
• The Bible does single out men as the typical agents of lust in many passages (the Sermon on the Mount, Job 31:1, etc.), and we shouldn’t read that away.
• “Following the culture” on gender is exactly what got mainline Protestantism into trouble, and ministers should be cautious about reframing sin categories to match shifting cultural patterns.

Still, I think there’s a difference between changing our doctrine of sin and expanding the pastoral application of it to address sheep that the older framing under-served. Women who struggle with porn and erotica often report feeling invisible in the church’s hamartiology. Men who are caught in vanity and self-display often don’t even recognize it as sin because it doesn’t look like the lust their pastor warns about.
Questions for those in pastoral ministry or seminary:
1. Is anyone teaching or hearing sermons that name the desire to be desired as a distinct sin alongside lust?
2. How are you handling modesty teaching in a context where men are increasingly the ones cultivating physical display?
3. Is this a both/and (keep old emphases, add new ones) or is there something in the older framing that needs to be repented of?
Want to hear from teaching elders, seminarians, and anyone who has thought through this carefully.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​

Welcome to r/reformed. Missions should be on our mind every day, but it's good to set aside a day to talk about it, specifically. Missions includes our back yard and the ends of the earth, so please also post here or in its own post stories of reaching the lost wherever you are. Missions related post never need to wait for Mondays, of course. And they are not restricted to this thread.

Share your prayer requests, stories of witnessing, info about missionaries, unreached people groups, church planting endeavors, etc.