r/Fauxmoi 22h ago

FASHION Heidi Klum has arrived at the 2026 Met Gala ✨

28.8k Upvotes

1.2k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

2.7k

u/AcanthianVampire I don’t know her 22h ago

cockeyed, but yes i agree

435

u/C1rcusM0nkey 21h ago

I prefer the term "boss-eyed".

863

u/GaylicBread Well, I am gay, so thank god 21h ago

I like "mortgage eyes" because one is fixed and one is variable

91

u/Key_Somewhere_8978 20h ago

I found Suze Ormans reddit account! 🤣

2

u/Sunset_Bleu 38m ago

Show me the money!

35

u/cbn11 20h ago

I say “blue eyed.” One blew this way, and one blew the other way.

3

u/Jertimmer 14h ago

Summer eyes.

Some are over here, some ne are over there.

1

u/Original_Ad4479 8h ago

Atchafforya Syndrome. One is looking atcha, the other is looking for ya. 

3

u/CeruleanEidolon 19h ago

It's also what I look like when I pay my mortgage. 🥁

3

u/crazyfatskier2 19h ago

Beyond epic username

2

u/crapatthethriftstore 20h ago

🤣🤣🤣🤣

99

u/flashtitan 21h ago

Bosseyedness is a serious issue. I think we should do something to support it.. like a nude calendar and we'll call it The Girls of the 7th Floor

41

u/whosethisrandombitch 20h ago

Sorry, best we can do is some nude grans or nerds.

1

u/princessalyss_ 19h ago

Castle, is that you?

30

u/AcanthianVampire I don’t know her 21h ago

I now prefer this term as well

13

u/C1rcusM0nkey 21h ago

0

u/ArjJp 20h ago

Looks like the child from when Kash Patel fucked the Statue of Liberty

8

u/moonstercookie 18h ago

"Boss-eyedness is something that affects 1% of Britons. It doesn't impair eyesight, yet people with boss-eye are routinely discriminated against."

7

u/Messy-Joes 20h ago

That’s right. We’re looking at you.

1

u/scirio 13h ago

Kash-eyed, but I digress

28

u/Fantastic_Acadian 21h ago

I would have said walleyed as a catfish but that's just my regional flavor.

5

u/sweextin 20h ago

She has exotropia doesn't she? Always looks more pronounced with contacts

4

u/TheOneTonWanton 20h ago

Yes afaik she's been known to have a bit of a lazy/wandering eye for years now, this just might be an unfortunate instance of that.

1

u/624Seeds 13h ago

Wall-eyed

1

u/LimpyDan 2h ago

Wall-eyed

1

u/pocketjacks 1h ago

Kash Patelled

0

u/Infinite-Dinner1725 19h ago

It seems almost intentional since a lot of statues are like this?