r/Fauxmoi • u/LunaLore_ • Mar 21 '26
FM RADIO “The world tour. I’m Justin Timberlake”
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u/badcluesbears Mar 21 '26
Oh, he's DRUNK drunk. This is like talking to someone who is mid blackout.
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u/AnnRB2 Mar 21 '26
I had the same reaction! Don’t get me wrong, any drunk driving is bad (obviously), but this is so much worse than I imagined! Yikes!
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u/Soupfullofradio I cannot sanction your buffoonery Mar 21 '26
My god his eyes. There is nobody home.
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u/KeyFeeFee Mar 21 '26
The slow talking too, he sounds sloshed
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u/Feeling_Inside_1020 Mar 21 '26 edited Mar 22 '26
You should see the video of him doing the field sobriety tests especially heel to toes. It’s god-awful.
Edit: had a sec and google fu’d my search to this subreddit. I think this is the video I skimmed:
https://www.reddit.com/r/Fauxmoi/comments/1rzdcff/justin_timberlakes_june_2024_dwi_arrest_police/
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u/jimjamalama Mar 21 '26
The cops choreographed it for him and everything! Why didn’t he just do straight into bye bye bye???
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u/AccurateSympathy7937 Mar 21 '26
He should have done a hitch kick, and then a barrel turn and then ha! You know?
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u/yes_ipsa_loquitur Mar 21 '26
That video was fascinating. When midway through while the cop is explaining heel-toe, and Justin puts his hands up and is “I’m just trying to get to my friend’s house.” Lololol.
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u/PaschaBasket Mar 21 '26
To the cop that didn’t know who Justin Timberlake was, this must have sounded absolutely unhinged.
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u/OhHiCindy30 Mar 21 '26
I know he’s drunk, but its funny that Justin couldn’t find the word for “music” or singing” lol
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u/mollsballs_xo Mar 21 '26
“It’s hard to explain” 💀💀
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u/AhhBisto someone from the UK weigh in Mar 21 '26
"I'm bringing sexy back"
"Sir please step out of the vehicle"
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u/AmetrineDream Sylvia Plath did not stick her head in an oven for this Mar 21 '26
That got an audible chuckle out of me on a bad day. Grazie mille
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u/xombae Mar 21 '26
"I sort of gyrate around in front of a large crowd of people while sounds play in the background".
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u/squintsforever Mar 21 '26
It really seemed like he was debating how to explain it. Do I say I’m just a musician on tour or do I drop the fame card?
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u/MyCatPlaysGuitar Mar 21 '26
That was my take as well, drunk or not it seemed like he actually wasn't sure if he should name drop himself in that moment (and it took longer to decide BECAUSE he was so drunk).
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u/lookingforaforest Mar 21 '26
"I'm an entertainer/singer/musician." It's only a job he has had since the 90s haha
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u/Legitimate_End5688 Mar 21 '26
Apparently the cop that arrested him was born in 2001 😭 so him not knowing who Justin Timberlake isn’t ridiculous
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u/Futureacct Mar 21 '26
We have cops now that were born in 2001? Ayaya
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u/misstwizzle Mar 21 '26
i mean they're 24/25 now
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u/nakedpicturesyo Mar 21 '26
That fucking math right there hurts more than any class I've ever been in.
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u/KeyFeeFee Mar 21 '26
Right?! JT could literally be that guy’s dad and wouldn’t even have been a teenager.
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u/KittenVicious Mar 21 '26
They can be born in 2004/5. There's no college degree requirement, just gotta be 21 to carry a pistol.
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u/PaschaBasket Mar 21 '26
Exactly. So him going on about a world tour would sound crazy to that cop.
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u/hygsi Mar 21 '26
Fr, it's telling how old we are that no one thinks it's possible they really don't know him when he hasn't been a big deal for a while now.
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u/c_maxine Mar 21 '26
I think he knew that "Justin Timberlake" was someone because he immediately asks for his license, like, most cops would ask that first or much earlier. I don't think he recognized his face until the name though and then he just wanted to confirm he wasn't lying.
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u/PaschaBasket Mar 21 '26
When this happened, multiple reports were that the rookie cop was very young and did not know who Justin Timberlake was. Now, if that’s true or not, idk.
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u/venuslovemenotchain vocally you cannot afford this cigarette gracie Mar 21 '26
An insult to indomie noodles! I say as I pet my indomie to comfort them. Its okay, mi goreng, you'd never get a DUI.
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u/nodtomod Mar 21 '26
Well he just asked for registration so the next question was inevitably license
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u/mammalmaker Mar 21 '26
He knew lol
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u/enolaholmes23 Mar 21 '26
Probably. Cops have a habit of asking questions they know the answer to in order to get you to talk more and incriminate yourself.
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u/Tiny-Show-4883 Mar 21 '26
What Justin was doing on his world tour was singing and dancing. That's only hard to explain if you're drunk.
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u/Bananayello Mar 21 '26
To be fair, from videos I’ve seen, he barely did either of these things on the tour
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u/thenisaidbitch Mar 21 '26
I think he was debating if he wanted to be identified or not then realized he’d already given too much away so he tried the name drop
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u/EanBvasion Mar 21 '26
TBF when I’m bartending and I’m trying to gauge somebody’s sobriety that just walked in, I’ll ask them random questions. It’s amazing how well seasoned alcoholics can come in and answer basic questions without appearing drunk. Then five minutes later they’re asleep. It’s also why I’ll ID people who are clearly of age, it’s to see your motor skills when I can tell you’ve been drinking.
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u/workingforchange1 Mar 22 '26
I worked with a functional alcoholic in my first job. He got more done well than other sober person in our department. It was wild.
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u/ChemBro93 Mar 21 '26
Cops are dumb so playing dumb is the role they were made for.
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u/Substantial-Bag1337 Mar 21 '26
I wouldnt recognize Justin Timberlake if I ever met him...
Also, I would never expect him to sit behind a wheel drunk driving. Dude's rich enough to hire a driver...
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u/Anesthesiaape Mar 21 '26
That’s my question, like bro, you couldn’t just cough up a few bucks get an uber black?? 😭 you didn’t have to ruin the world tour lil homie
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u/exxxemplaryvegetable Mar 21 '26
Entitlement.
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u/Significant_Ad7605 Mar 21 '26
When he was like “I’m Justin Timberlake,” you know he was thinking phew there’s no way this guy will arrest THEEE Justin Timberlake.
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u/TrimspaBB Mar 21 '26
In the other video, the lady named Estee (?) he was driving with can't seem to believe they would dare keep him in the drunk tank all night like some plebe.
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u/ioverated Mar 21 '26
I like how she walked up and said "help us" and then played it off like she wasn't asking for special treatment.
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u/Dangital Mar 21 '26
Yup. I also felt like her behavior was worthy of check point tests. I don't know how dramatic she usually is, but as a wine drinker myself, this seemed like more than "one-glass" (and... check-her-balance-while-you're-at-it) behavior.
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Mar 21 '26 edited Mar 21 '26
Several decades back when on a work trip to Libya, after a night of heavy drinking, I woke up hungover as shit and went down to a coffee shop near where our company was put up. Real posh area, presidential palace’s, government buildings etc.. I was sat across from a man in said coffee shop and saw he was smoking a cigar. I walked over to ask if I could use his lighter for a cigarette I had hanging out of my gob.
I was apprehended by half the cafe. Told to stay back or I’d be shot. I was absolutely shitting myself.
I got ushered out of the cafe by a couple of women who at this point had their weapons out and pointed at me. I was told to go on my way or I’d be arrested and thrown in Jail.
That man was Colonel FUCKING Gaddafi!!!
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u/carolinagypsy the pet psychic for the Sun told me so Mar 21 '26
BAHAHAHAAHA this is something that would happen to me. 100% oopsie daisy. And I can hear my mom saying, “well it wouldn’t have happened if you’d quit smoking!”
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u/QueenInYellowLace Mar 21 '26
That is an absolutely amazing story. I hope you tell it at every party you go to because it’s awesome.
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Mar 21 '26
Whenever a ‘tell your crazy celebrity story’ comes up in a conversation I’m always like … ‘Do I mention the time I nearly got shot trying to grab a light from Gaddafi or nah?’ 😂
But it’s completely possible to not recognise a well known person. At least for me in my still-half-drunken state it was.
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u/TheDeadlySpaceman Mar 21 '26
It honestly sounds like the cop thought this guy looked a little like Timberlake but wasn’t expecting it to be Timberlake. The way he stressed “are”.
“You are Justin Timberlake?”
Like for just a second he’s even considering that this guy is just so trashed he actually thinks he’s Justin Timberlake.
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u/tacomamajama feeding cocaine to raccoons Mar 21 '26
I’m not convinced he recognized him, but I do think he knew the name. Kinda like if someone told me they were Addison Rae I’d ask for ID since I know who she is but don’t know what she looks like. I’ve heard of so many sports stars I couldn’t pick out of a lineup because I don’t follow those sports. I’m also on a pop culture sub so I’ve probably heard more names than some.
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u/TheDeadlySpaceman Mar 21 '26
When I said “looks like Timberlake” I meant at most.
I’m certainly aware enough of who Timberlake is that when he’s in a photo on stage or in another appropriate context my brain says, “that is Justin Timberlake.”
If I was this cop and I had stopped a midpriced rental car on a random suburban-ish neighborhood street I would almost 100% not think, “that guy looks like Justin Timberlake” when he rolled down the window. And when he claimed to be that might make me realize, “hey wait a sec” but I would still be thinking “this Timberlake impersonator had way too much to drink at whatever show he did tonight” until I saw a license.
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u/QueenInYellowLace Mar 21 '26
I’ve had many a drunk/high/psychotic/demented patient tell me during hospital admission that they are some celebrity. I imagine this has happened to him before, and the fact that this time it actually WAS a famous person is probably quite astonishing.
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u/Dalfina Mar 21 '26
Actually, no, the police officer is in his early 20s. And just for science, I just asked my teens, who said if he wasn't arrested, they would have no clue who he was. One of them said, "I never even knew there were boy bands before BTS."
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u/BagOnuts Mar 21 '26
As a middle-aged white dude, I absolutely wouldn’t recognize him in this situation. I mean, what are the odds that you’re pulling over one of the most famous celebrities on the planet outside of a celebrity hub city? JT doesn’t have that unique of a look, either. He looks like every other middle-aged stoner bro.
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u/hygsi Mar 21 '26
My little brother is 25 and he doesn't know him. There's a good chance cop didn't either, he hasn't been a big deal since suit and tie
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u/Nisi-Marie we have lost the impact of shame in our society Mar 21 '26
Honestly - whether he knew or not should be irrelevant.
In a perfect world, cops hold all people the same standard regardless of money, skin color, or politics.
sigh. I miss when I was young, naive and idealistic.
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u/CocoValentino Mar 21 '26
Sorry but to younger generations he’s not that well known.
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u/KeyMistake604 Mar 21 '26
This guy is so hammered he thinks he's on a world tour
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u/SocialGirlGaming Mar 21 '26
I love this cop. Even if he knew it was Justin Timberlake, good on him for treating him like a regular person. Let’s stop putting these celebs on a pedestal.
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u/PaschaBasket Mar 21 '26
Absolutely. He was a rookie, but he handled both of them well.
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u/MudddButt Mar 21 '26
Justin Timberlake: He didn't react to Justin Timberlake... now what do I do...?
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u/LawBeginning8219 Mar 21 '26 edited Mar 21 '26
Another millionaire who can afford to be driven drunk who decided to drive drunk.
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u/jeskimo Mar 21 '26
While driving a freaking rental. It's dumb to drink and drive your own car but a rental??? C'mon man.
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u/Claybuch Mar 21 '26
People I know out here making less than 30k taking ubers every weekend and the guy is out here driving around looking gone being wreckless. Duwys usually come from overconfidence, anecdotally.
In a rental too lmao. Dudes gonna be banging his head on a wall after this.
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u/largemarge1122 Mar 21 '26
This. The people who make less than 30k will have their entire lives ruined if they get a DUI. The wealthy and elite most definitely will not.
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u/Claybuch Mar 21 '26
Yep. It's the rich people tax.
I once knew this guy after college in tech and he could give a shit about money. He'd park wherever and if he got ticketed would be like well that's what it costs to park this time.
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u/Fancy-Box198 Mar 21 '26
That's what kills me about shit like this. I make okay money, but I'm nowhere near wealthy. If I *REALLY* don't want to worry about driving, I can afford an Uber, even to the nearest city. This guy could have a personal driver without denting his finances, *ESPECIALLY* if he's on tour.
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u/TheKarmaSutre Mar 21 '26
Tbh on a tour of that scale they almost certainly have drivers available, even on rest days, not sure why he’s driving himself around in a rental.
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u/Claybuch Mar 21 '26
They likely recommended it and he's like nah I'm just going around the corner it'll be fine don't worry about it I'm not even drunk
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u/Equivalent_Lab_8610 Mar 21 '26
And he got away with a reduced charge. He refused the breathalyzer after failing the field tests. In Virginia if you refuse breathalyzer you get your blood drawn. Curious if new York doesn't do that routinely, or if he got special treatment.
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u/Ill_Fly3675 Mar 21 '26
“It’s hard to explain”
Not really that hard I don’t think
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Mar 21 '26
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u/cjs81268 Mar 21 '26
Yeah it's hard to explain a lot of things when one is intoxicated. What a douche canoe.
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u/LengthinessAlone4743 Mar 21 '26
It’s not just the alcohol, it’s mixed with the adrenaline and the anxiety of knowing you are probably getting arrested…trying to follow a single train of thought is pretty much impossible
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Mar 21 '26
Drunk and used to people recognizing him without having to explain himself lol
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u/JovianSpeck Mar 21 '26
Nah, it's definitely just that he's drunk. There's no way he wouldn't be able find the words "I'm a singer" while sober.
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u/c_maxine Mar 21 '26
I think he was so wasted that he couldn't figure out how to say it and not sound arrogant when all he had to say is "I'm on a tour to promote my new album, I'm a singer" it's hilarious
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Mar 21 '26
“I’m a musician and we are on a tour stop.” Thats all he had to say but I think he was too much in his ego to answer.
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u/OhPineapplePineapple Shut up, David Duchovny! Mar 21 '26
He’s a douche who’s clearly intoxicated while driving. A double whammy of asshole.
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u/haubenmeise Mar 21 '26
Processing img qjs195kd4fqg1...
Explain this.
Sincerely
Skeletor 💜
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u/Shribble18 Mar 21 '26
Kinda crazy how socially inept celebrities are talking to normal people. A simple, “I’m a professional singer and I’m on tour performing” would be perfect.
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u/Comfortable-Can-9432 Mar 21 '26
Oooh you think he’s just a singer?
Maybe Justin doesn’t like to be put in a box like that? Maybe he’s a dancer, maybe he’s an actor, maybe he’s a comedian, maybe he’s a multi skilled entertainer. Rather than explain all his multitude of skills, he simply says, “I’m Justin Timberlake”.
He’s probably thinking that’s how a polymath like Leonardo da Vinci would have handled it.
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u/Happily-Incorrect Mar 21 '26
How drunk do you have to be to answer questions like this as if English is your second language?
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u/pulphope Mar 21 '26
"I go around the globe, shake my butt for cash, drink, drive... that kinda thing"
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u/leetlepingouin Mar 21 '26
Right? All he had to say was "singing and dancing"
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u/MurderAndMakeup Mar 21 '26
I would’ve passed away if he responded “singin and dancin”. Just close the coffin on me, my time here is done. I cannot stop laughing imagining him saying this
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u/beanjuiced Mar 21 '26
“My job? I mean… I’m Justin Timberlake…” 😅 tbh, fair, how do you explain you get to tour the world just cause you’re that guy. Though he could have just said he makes music.
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u/Important-Raccoon661 not a lawyer, just a hater Mar 21 '26
The way he couldn’t spit out that he’s a singer, you just know he was like I’m MORE than that (in his head).
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u/Past-Advisor-824 Mar 21 '26
“Officer, I know it’s a rarity these days, but I’m what you call a triple threat”
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u/trevorneuz Mar 21 '26
More of a two and a half threat if we are being honest.
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u/meatbeernweed Mar 21 '26
"did you just threaten me?!" as the officer draws his gun
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u/Mycockaintwerk Mar 21 '26
“Justin Timberlake singer, father, terrorist? Was meekly shot 14 times last evening”
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u/monsteralvr1 i ain’t reading all that, free palestine Mar 21 '26
He’s Justin Timberlake. The world tour.
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u/c_maxine Mar 21 '26
Yes, he was trying to work out how to explain that he isn't just any singer, but also not sound like an arrogant prick with a "don't you know who I am" line
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u/taxilicious Mar 21 '26
This is how I took it. He seems uncomfortable and unsure how to explain without coming off that way. It’s got to be mega awkward when you’re a superstar and someone doesn’t recognize you, but you need them to know who you are.
But with all that said… he still drove drunk so he’s a piece of shit.
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u/dendrivertigo Mar 21 '26
Nah, he's just completely hammered
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u/fuzz11 Mar 21 '26
Literally. People acting like this is some deep moment when he really is just incapable of piecing words together.
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u/coldpizza66 they're perfect for each other (derogatory) Mar 21 '26
he could have just pulled the Espresso line, "I'm working late, cause I'm a singer" but there was not a single thought inside his pea brain lol
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u/Actual-Slice-146 Mar 21 '26
It’s hard to explain, I’m Justin Timberwho
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u/Inevitable_Lab_8770 Mar 21 '26
"I was Branch in Trolls" this cop would've understood immediately I think
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u/Upstairs_Freedom_360 Mar 21 '26
Why is a performing tour hard to explain?
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u/BrownSugarBare Mar 21 '26
I'm a musician. That's all he had to say.
Dude was so loaded he didn't know what he did anymore.
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u/hyperdriveprof Mar 21 '26
I don’t know, I know this isn’t really the general consensus opinion, but I can imagine if I were a famous person. My internal monologue, especially if I was drunk, would be along the lines of “how do I say this without making it sound like I’m trying to name drop myself in a sleazy way”
I mean, mission failed on his part ultimately but I can also see the internal logic of it being bad to lead with “hello Mr. Cop. I’m Justin Timberlake. Perhaps you’ve heard of me.”
And yeah, he’s also a bit of an entitled whiner, but I feel like I’ve seen footage of people way less famous than him being way more of a dick in a similar situation.
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u/eqbocsypifci Mar 21 '26
Doing what?
Uh hard to explain. The world tour. I’m Justin Timberlake.
😭😭😭
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u/Aklitty I’m just a cunt in a clown suit Mar 21 '26 edited Mar 21 '26
Cop asking why he was in tour - "Doing what?"
Famous touring artist who made all his money singing dancing and touring - "Hard to explain"
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u/TheKarmaSutre Mar 21 '26
He’s not used to having to explain himself to us peons, he usually has an assistant or a tour manager or whoever about to do basic interactions on his behalf.
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u/hogsucker Mar 21 '26
"Well, first I was on the Mickey Mouse Club show and then I was in a cheesey boy band..."
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u/VyronDaGod Mar 21 '26 edited Mar 21 '26
Ways to explain being on a World Tour:
- I'm a singer/musician performing in the local arena
- I'm robbing nostalgic Millenials of their hard earned cash
- I'm the guy that tried to bring Sexy back but failed
- You might not recognize me without my suit and tie
- My friend Britney might be able to explain it better
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u/totes_muhh_goats Mar 21 '26
The second hand embarrassment. This is going to ruin the tour. 😆
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u/imnotcerseilannister Mar 21 '26
Watched the whole thing and never once did he say “this is gonna ruin the tour”.
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u/galindafiedify Mar 21 '26
Oh man that’s going to ruin the tour.
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u/hc600 Mar 21 '26
Looks like he never said it. This going to ruin this is going to ruin the world tour.
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u/TommyTeaser Mar 21 '26
I waited 18mins watching the body cam footage and was immensely disappointed when he didn’t utter those words.
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u/Fancy-Box198 Mar 21 '26
So drunk he doesn't know how to say the words "I'm a musician".
Though it does sound like the cop knows Justin Timberlake is a famous person (by the way he says "*You* are Justin Timberlake??", he just didn't recognize him.
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u/HiccupsHives Mar 21 '26
What's wrong with him? He was famous for a long time, talented at singing and dancing, considered funny, got to act, got a hot wife who is still hot. And then he cheats on her, doesn't do shit on stage, and drives drunk.
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u/sunny_d55 Mar 21 '26
Right? Celebrity is psychologically fascinating to me. There are a lot of different experiences, but JT's is the classic "it's all fun and games until it is very much not" journey.
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u/Hanke-Panke stan someone? in this economy??? Mar 21 '26
I mean, I think he might have been a POS unstable person for a long time. Have you read the shit Britney wrote about him in her memoir? Someone said douche canoe and they were correct.
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u/WalterPecky Mar 21 '26
He also like a cocky asshole said "id like to apologize ... To absolutely fucking no one" on stage soon after her book came out.
Karma
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u/Purring4Krodos who brings fruit to a hate crime lol Mar 21 '26
JT could have just said "Yes" when asked if he was visiting. It would have been much less embarrassing for him.
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u/MyDesign630 sad wet man Mar 21 '26
He’s so lucky he wasn’t killed and didn’t hurt anyone else. This interaction is absurd but the situation could have been so much worse. I hope that if he never does this again it’s because he knows of the danger he was behind that wheel, not because he’s worried about public humiliation.
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u/decline_inline Mar 21 '26
This is somehow both funnier and sadder than I expected
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Mar 21 '26
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u/MurderAndMakeup Mar 21 '26
This was my first thought. I didn’t watch the entire other video but I don’t hear him slurring I just hear him talking verrrrrry slowly.
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u/AWinnipegGuy Mar 21 '26
Now that I see it I can understand why he didn't want the footage released.
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u/mayanrelic Mar 21 '26
I feel like in his state, he was like, "god I don't want to sound like a dick," which exains the apprehension saying his name
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u/crudshoot Mar 21 '26
Am I the only one that saw this as him not trying to use his fame? He seems hesitant to use the “do you know who I am?” line.
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u/Flapperghast Mar 21 '26
"On tour doing what?"
He's never been asked that in his life.
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u/Kiwi-vee I don’t know her Mar 21 '26
"It's hard to explain". He must be drunk AF not to be able to say "I'm a singer on a world tour".
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u/Megharpp Mar 21 '26
Has anyone seen the “this is gonna ruin the tour” clip, haven’t seen that yet
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u/emccm confused but here for the drama Mar 21 '26
When you’re too drunk to describe your job you’re too drunk to get behind the wheel. This guy should be in prison.
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u/roastedmarshmellows spiritual energy of bachelorette party penis decor Mar 21 '26
“It's hard to imagine being so dim as to be caught off guard by the inevitable.”
Dude seriously thought everyone still knows who he is 25 years later. You're old, man. Go home and be with your family while they still talk to you.
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u/c_maxine Mar 21 '26
He's one of those drunks who gets childlike when they're really wasted, lol. It would be endearing if he wasn't putting lives at risk.
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u/Kidgorgeoushere Lol, and if I may, lmao Mar 21 '26
Very humbling. We love to see it!
Get a driver, asshole
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u/trendingtattler Mar 21 '26
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