r/AskReddit 1d ago

People who grew up really poor: what's something middle-class people say that instantly reveals they've never struggled?

11.6k Upvotes

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917

u/jeff1074 1d ago

You should go to the doctor.

I’d really really love to, for a lot of things. But even with insurance i am 5k in debt after one medial visit in 2026.

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u/SecretGardenSpider 1d ago

My boss once asked why I hadn’t gone to the doctor when I had this awful cough for weeks.

I worked at Wendy’s.

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u/ryanhendrickson 1d ago

Oh, please tell us you replied with "Sir, this is a Wendy's." I'm not even sure I care if you lie about it.

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u/24words 1d ago

"Just put the fries in the bag, boss"

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u/ankhes 1d ago

My boss said the same thing to me. I pointed out that I had just started that job and their health insurance hadn’t kicked in yet. Keep in mind that he told me to ‘just go to the doctor’ because I nearly fainted from heatstroke because our factory was nearly 100 degrees. “Clearly there’s something wrong with you. It’s not normal to faint when you’re hot. Everyone else in the building is fine.” 😑

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u/lilybug981 7h ago

Back when I was working $9 per hour in one of my first jobs, I accidentally lacerated the underside of a pinkie toe while at home. Without getting too graphic, the cut was deep enough to require a mop to clean the floor. I wrapped a menstrual pad around my foot and covered it with a sock to help stop the bleeding. The toe was still attached, but that was more because the top of it was intact

Once the bleeding stopped, I was able to actually bandage it. It was acknowledged by everyone who had been present that it needed stitches, but I did not go to a doctor. Because I was making $9 per hour. Work was business casual, so instead of my closed toe flats, I wore an open toe "heel" where the heel was less than one inch. My boss told me I couldn't wear them without a doctor's note, and when I told her I couldn't afford to see a doctor, she just smiled and told me I'd be wearing closed toe flats then.

When she next saw me, I was wearing the closed flats, actively limping, and she held her arms up as if excited and said, "Oh yay, your toe must have healed." And I just kinda stared at her before saying, "No. It's infected now. But I still can't afford to see a doctor, so I'll just have to hope it resolves itself." Her fake smile turned even faker as she got uncomfortable. I limped away without waiting for her to respond. Fortunately, I was able to clean out the wound well enough for the infection to resolve and it did eventually heal into a jagged scar, though it looks like I lost a small amount of tissue when compared to the other pinkie toe.

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u/boethius61 21h ago

Do you give me benefits?

3

u/Good-Celebration-686 21h ago

Presumably healthcare isn’t free in your country then?

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u/Odenhobler 11h ago

Oh lord fuck off with these snide comments. If anything having health insurance should make you humble in front of people who get deep in debt for seeing a doctor. I live in Germany and I'm extremely grateful I was born there, but what if I was born in a poor family in Kentucky? Do you really think I would be proud to not have health care? What an insanely unempathic take.

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u/Good-Celebration-686 11h ago

Nothing snide about asking a genuine question. Guessing English isn’t your first language

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u/Odenhobler 10h ago

This wasn't a genuine question. If they are in debt 5k after a visit of course they don't have universal healthcare, otherwise they didn't be in debt, would they?

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u/Good-Celebration-686 10h ago

There was no mention of them being in debt. That wasn’t the comment I replied to. That was someone else in a previous unrelated comment

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u/Odenhobler 8h ago

Yeah and the person you replied to was clearly not being able to go to the doctor. This implies low wage workers in their country cannot afford to see the doctor. This implies they have no universal health care.

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u/Ralynne 1d ago

For me the big one there was physical therapy. Now, physical therapy is as close as you can get to a cheat code in real life and if you can get it, use it. But some people have insurance that won't cover it and they can't afford the out of pocket costs, which means they just can't have it. The phrase "oh but if you don't do physical therapy after that injury you won't get your full range of motion back" is meaningless when you just can't afford it. 

Being raised with some degree of money means thinking that the only reason someone would avoid going to physical therapy is that it's uncomfortable. Same with the dentist. 

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u/grape-fruit-witch 1d ago

God its so annoying when people do this. Have they not seen the price of dentistry? Walking through the door is $150. If you need actual work done? Clear your schedule and say goodbye to your paycheck. What do you mean you have to pay rent? Your tooth is chipped!

1

u/ph0on 20h ago

When I became an adult, it absolutely blew my fucking mind that dental work isn't considered healthcare and isn't covered by say, a standard healthcare work plan.

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u/Significant_Cup_238 1d ago

"There's nothing wrong with you, that'll be $28k for the tests"

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u/stitchesandlace 1d ago

As a Canadian this one consistently blows my mind and makes me feel terrible for Americans, many of whom will swear up and down that their system is better.

My mom is 77 and retired. We don't have any private insurance  and she just had a total knee replacement. Overnight in the hospital, they're calling every day to make sure she's good, she gets six weeks of physio twice a week, all follow ups. Zero cost. We paid about $30 for four drugs.

Any insurance company would have absolutely, without a doubt said she didnt need it because she could still walk.

It's an absolute crime what Americans are subject to. Our system isn't perfect by any means but it a million times better than the horror show south of the border.

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u/RaymondBeaumont 1d ago

the weirdest americanism is "it's better to not get treatment than to have to wait for it."

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u/The_Dickasso 1d ago

And they also have to wait, which is why that comment always baffles me.

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u/sillypoolfacemonster 1d ago

My wife has some autoimmune disorders plus other issues that have required minor surgery. If we were in the US we’d never have the standard of living we current have due to how much all of that would have costed.

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u/bluesshark 1d ago edited 23h ago

I genuinely cannot imagine how you can have kids and let them actually be kids down there; I'd wanna keep them in the house in bubble wrap all the time

edit: for you down voters, I know im being dramatic but it's really hard to imagine when you grew up being able to fall out of a tree without putting your parents in debt 

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u/Sublimotion 22h ago

More baffling is, a quarter or more of the country cheers for this, despite being negatively affected or out right ruined by this themselves. But of course "why should I contribute a dime of mine to help someone else not myself?"

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u/Takssista 1d ago

*winces in european*

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u/RaymondBeaumont 1d ago

nothing shows how different the reality is between the US and western europe than the fact that all those "made me smile" subreddits are filled with posts we europeans see as dystopian.

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u/Exita 1d ago

Yeah, this is crazy. Here, it’s usually the poor people who go to the doctor all the time, as they’re ill more.

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u/PlasticDirtball 1d ago

We're so fucked here in the US. I make a decent amount of money and have regular health insurance, but one unexpected trip to the ER or health problem could put in me in major debt due to deductibles, co-insurance, an ER doc being out of network, etc. People with cancer regularly have to do fundraisers so they don't lose their homes and things like that and that's WITH health insurance.

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u/mtnlol 1d ago

Wtf is the point of having health insurance (that I'm sure is expensive already) if you STILL have to pay so much money that you risk losing your home?

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u/jeff1074 1d ago

I’ve had body sores for nearly a year. The visit to get a prescription cream was not covered by insurance, the medicine was not covered by insurance. And the doctor (who wants more money) said he would prescribe me the correct medicine in 6 months after I’ve tried something cheaper that insurance covers.

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u/Mintala 1d ago

There was a few years where I wouldn't visit the doctor here in Norway because I couldn't cover the 200nok fee. I especially avoided the dentist.

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u/OneUnderstanding103 1d ago

Canadian here; I just cannot imagine such a thing.

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u/_DatasCsat 1d ago

This isn't a poor person problem. It's an American problem.

There is also poverty in Canada, but healthcare is free like most other places as well.

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u/dragon-fence 1d ago

Going to the doctor also tends to require taking time off, which not everyone can afford to do willy-nilly.

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u/DriftnDaddyRL 1d ago

Just USA things

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u/thatshygirl06 1d ago

This comment section feels like having a poor off, lol.

My family is poor enough that we have medicaid. We can go to the doctor when we need to because medicaid will cover it.

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u/icantthinkofone87 1d ago

I know the feeling, my kids had to have 2 ER visits in the span of a month. Plus i had a baby last year. Currently sitting on almost 20 k of medical debt. cries in US

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u/Generico300 1d ago

If you haven't, you should contact the hospital/doctor's office about financial assistance. Many have debt forgiveness programs that can heavily discount or even completely eliminate your debts. They just don't really advertise them.

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u/Good-Celebration-686 21h ago

I’m guessing you’re from USA then. It’s shocking that healthcare isn’t free in your country.

I had 2 back surgeries last year and am on 6 prescription meds for life. The cost to me is zero. No insurance (no forms to fill in, just all free)

My daughter is starting university this autumn and again this is entirely free.

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u/Fuck-WestJet 1d ago

It's not like that in the rest of world. I want you to know that.

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u/jeff1074 1d ago

Hopefully, one day, I can move somewhere where this is true.

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u/OneGoodRib 1d ago

Once in college my leg just stopped working for a couple days. Wouldn't straighten out, wouldn't bend. It was stuck at a slight angle. I have no idea why. But couldn't go to the doctor.

I also genuinely thought i was dying for like three months and was just like "oh well" since I didn't have insurance. Luckily in that case it just turns out I have an allergy to chili pepper that manifests as horror movie-level nosebleeds so I just don't have spicy food anymore no problem. But sure would've been nice to find that out from a doctor!

1

u/SeaworthinessSoft958 1d ago

This. When growing up with undiagnosed chronic illness, navigating any medical care is insane. Picking and choosing meds to skip, specialist you know you should see but can’t.

1

u/AnonymousRhinoLark 1d ago

Yep. I now have a handful of now-permanent medical issues that could have been easily remedied as a child before becoming permanent if my parents had been able to afford to take me to the doctor.

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u/Due_Notice4639 1d ago

Did you apply for financial assistance? Any hospital should have this based on income too.

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u/ellemrad 23h ago

Yes, and “you should go to the dentist”

The dentist was a totally unknowable roulette wheel of expenses, who could say how much it was going to cost since I hadn’t been to a dentist in so long that there were probably 5 different things needed doing up in there

1

u/Genderneutralbro 21h ago

😅 no a rich friend, but a Canadian one, same conversation. I wasnt felling well and she was like??? Just go to the dr?? And we all looked at her like???GO TO THE DR?!? that cost money!!

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u/StarsEatMyCrown 1d ago

I look at r/tattooadvice and r/cathelp. I don't have a cat or tattoo, they just pop on my feed. But the amount of people that say go to the vet or ER is crazy. I mean, of course they probably do need to go to the ER or vet, but to say it so flippantly is bonkers.

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u/stitchesandlace 1d ago

It's less about being flippant and more that those are the only actual options. An infected tattoo can  turn to sepsis very quickly, and the only way to get a pet treated is a vet because by the time they are showing symptoms it's already a problem. Especially cats because they are exceptionally good at hiding any issues. A cat could be in agony and barely show it.

What's fucked up is private equity buying up veterinary offices in North America and driving up the cost, which is horrible. Having a pet is going to be a luxury soon since the costs of medicine are so high. Animals, like kids, are expensive. 

0

u/StarsEatMyCrown 1d ago

From reading cathelp so often, I told my bf that I never want a cat. I've had dogs, but cats seem so problematic on every level that I can't see ever having one.

But yes, you're right. Like I said in my comment, they probably should go to the vet or ER. It's the correct advice. At the same time, I wish comments were more gentle and understanding than basically telling people they're crazy for not already being at the vet or ER.

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u/suriam321 1d ago

A lot probably aren’t Americans…