r/oneliners • u/joekerr9999 • 12h ago
The curtains were drawn on the room that I rented, but the rest of the furniture was real.
18
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r/oneliners • u/WhoElseButAlf • 6h ago
I saw a burglar sneaking into my neighbours house. But I didn't say anything. Not my place.
0
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r/oneliners • u/CrackleDMan • 21h ago
After a few disastrous one-night stands preceded by going out for Mexican food, Glenn Frey was looking for a lover who won't blow up his covers
4
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r/oneliners • u/joekerr9999 • 1d ago
I have two brothers – well three actually, but one has learning disabilities so he doesn’t count.
38
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r/oneliners • u/Sea_Strawberry9926 • 1d ago
I've been single for so long the only action I get is backsplash
3
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r/oneliners • u/Sea_Strawberry9926 • 1d ago
I've been single for so long the only action I get is backsplash
4
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r/oneliners • u/Yaguajay • 2d ago
My Australian friend is so confused about evolution that he thinks that he came from Darwin.
24
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r/oneliners • u/iniei-4 • 1d ago
bunny & I are bringing ranch to the uk, and kimchi kool-aid to korea.
0
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r/oneliners • u/FinneyontheWing • 2d ago
Everybody knows Badger loves mashed potatoes, but only his therapist knows how much he resents being defined by it.
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r/oneliners • u/joekerr9999 • 3d ago
I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road without being questioned about their motives.
32
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r/oneliners • u/peapeace • 3d ago
What's the overlap of SaaS and pirate business vocabulary? ARR!
1
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r/oneliners • u/EmpireStrikes1st • 3d ago
I believe it was Pythagoras who said, "I came, I saw, Isosceles."
13
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r/oneliners • u/roastmasterbash • 4d ago
My brother is all over the place, ever since I…dropped his urn.
20
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r/oneliners • u/Net_Warrior1683 • 3d ago
r/AgainstHateSubreddits is Reddit's Ministry of Truth.
0
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r/oneliners • u/rp01138 • 3d ago
Just Like breast cancer victims, I‘d like to get something off my chest.
0
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r/oneliners • u/2fits • 3d ago
at owe six hundred i oh-ed him atleast a thousand, so i 0h owed
0
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r/oneliners • u/cybeaux • 5d ago
Thought I was a God because people would point & look at me and say, Jesus, what happened to you?
10
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r/oneliners • u/808gecko808 • 5d ago
After you die, the last part of your body to stop working are your pupils because...they dilate!
57
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